BMW E60 5-Series Forum | 5Post.com  
BMW Garage BMW Meets Register Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read  

Go Back   BMW E60 5-Series Forum | 5Post.com > BIMMERPOST Universal Forums > Off-Topic Discussions Board

Post Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
      03-11-2020, 10:58 AM   #3477
King Rudi
Lieutenant Colonel
King Rudi's Avatar
8927
Rep
1,685
Posts

Drives: Meat Suit
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Planet Earth

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by pennsiveguy View Post
We called that maneuver the "Poke and Pivot."

One of the funniest things I've ever seen, and which will probably remain so forever, is the time a guy hit a railroad track with the forks.

He was in one of our big Hyster 195s, which were monsters and had a pretty decent top speed - probably around 20 mph. He usually operated smaller lifts, so he was probably hot-dogging and having a great time.

The yard foreman and I were bullshitting near one of our rail stubs and heard a roar coming around a corner and turned to make sure we weren't about to get run over. The forklift soon appeared and was running flat-out. The forks were empty and we could see right away the operator had them tilted forward slightly and way too low for hauling ass across that uneven yard; the tips were skimming the tar.

When he hit the rail crossing, both forks hit the rail square and that 30,000-pound machine instantly stopped dead and reared up and pitched him into the windshield. For a split-second he looked like a 2-year-old clowning around mushing his face against a car window.

The foreman and I saw the whole thing from 20 feet away and nearly pissed ourselves - once we knew he was okay, that is.

The operator got a gorgeous bilateral shiner, and I spent a half-hour grinding the barbs off the fork tips so you could actually set stuff down again with it.


I'll tell one on myself. When I first started operating a forklift, years ago; I was on a 5k lift unloading a container of new production line equipment. The load I was transporting was way too heavy for the lift. I was able to get the load lifted (barely) and started slowly making my way to the area the equipment was to be installed. In this facility, we had LGV (laser guided vehicles) as material handlers. Basically unmanned robots that were pre-programmed to pick up material from one department and transport to another. I had an LGV cross my path as I was transporting this heavy ass load so I tapped the brakes. This caused the steer tires to be raised off the ground by about a foot thus creating a situation where I could not steer.....instant butt pucker. I thought for sure that the seat of the forklift would need to be replaced; first from the the tear my clinched ass cheeks were about to create and second from the stains that were about to come after. Somehow I calmly thought to lower the load, redefine the stability point and lowered my steer tires back on the ground. I have to say the feeling of doing an indo or nose-wheelie on a 7,5000 pound of equipment, while loaded and trying to avoid another machine coming directly at me, was more than enough to wake me up that morning.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by jmg View Post
We're Americans. Leave your logic and science witchcraft out of this! Jesus and guns are all we need.
Appreciate 1
      03-11-2020, 11:24 AM   #3478
pennsiveguy
Major
pennsiveguy's Avatar
United_States
3270
Rep
1,020
Posts

Drives: F15 xDrive50i M-sport
Join Date: Apr 2019
Location: Edina, MN

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Quote:
Originally Posted by Now_Rudi View Post


I'll tell one on myself. When I first started operating a forklift, years ago; I was on a 5k lift unloading a container of new production line equipment. The load I was transporting was way too heavy for the lift. I was able to get the load lifted (barely) and started slowly making my way to the area the equipment was to be installed. In this facility, we had LGV (laser guided vehicles) as material handlers. Basically unmanned robots that were pre-programmed to pick up material from one department and transport to another. I had an LGV cross my path as I was transporting this heavy ass load so I tapped the brakes. This caused the steer tires to be raised off the ground by about a foot thus creating a situation where I could not steer.....instant butt pucker. I thought for sure that the seat of the forklift would need to be replaced; first from the the tear my clinched ass cheeks were about to create and second from the stains that were about to come after. Somehow I calmly thought to lower the load, redefine the stability point and lowered my steer tires back on the ground. I have to say the feeling of doing an indo or nose-wheelie on a 7,5000 pound of equipment, while loaded and trying to avoid another machine coming directly at me, was more than enough to wake me up that morning.


Yup, had that happen many times. One guy had it happen on one of the big lifts carrying a couple of big units of lumber. The back wheels only came back to the ground after the top unit slid off the front. Once that happened the ass end came down hard enough to break some stuff in the rear axle, and I think we had to replace a couple of the bolts that held the counterweight in place. That was a noisy, scary mess.
__________________
2017 F15 xDrive50i M Sport | Superformance GT40 Roush 511 IR FE
Appreciate 0
      03-11-2020, 12:13 PM   #3479
Darth One
drunk poster
Darth One's Avatar
United_States
4094
Rep
2,953
Posts

Drives: M4 GTS | E46 M3
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: FL

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by pennsiveguy View Post
We called that maneuver the "Poke and Pivot."
Thatís interesting, thatís also what i call my go-to sex move
Appreciate 5
      03-11-2020, 01:52 PM   #3480
pennsiveguy
Major
pennsiveguy's Avatar
United_States
3270
Rep
1,020
Posts

Drives: F15 xDrive50i M-sport
Join Date: Apr 2019
Location: Edina, MN

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Quote:
Originally Posted by Darth One View Post
Thatís interesting, thatís also what i call my go-to sex move
__________________
2017 F15 xDrive50i M Sport | Superformance GT40 Roush 511 IR FE
Appreciate 0
      03-11-2020, 03:18 PM   #3481
FuriouslyFast
Banned
United_States
821
Rep
378
Posts

Drives: Miss Daisy
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Is the apocalypse here yet? If not, please come soon.

Sincerely,
I'm done
Appreciate 2
King Rudi8927.00

      03-12-2020, 12:57 PM   #3482
FuriouslyFast
Banned
United_States
821
Rep
378
Posts

Drives: Miss Daisy
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Someone is supposed to buy the MS6 this weekend for about $2500 more than I have in it. Gotta sell right?
Appreciate 0
      03-12-2020, 01:45 PM   #3483
upstatedoc
I'll get back to you
upstatedoc's Avatar
4791
Rep
2,073
Posts

Drives: blue streak
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: not downstate

iTrader: (2)

Sell it now, you can't take it with you.
__________________
2018 Stinger GT
1997 Toyota T100
2009 E90 N51 /Active Autowerke Stage 2 tune/BMW Performance Exhaust/
Countermeasure enthusiast.
Appreciate 0
      03-12-2020, 01:48 PM   #3484
Rmtt
Colonel
Rmtt's Avatar
United_States
8037
Rep
2,198
Posts

Drives: 2011 BMW 128i, 2008 LS3 C6
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: South Carolina

iTrader: (3)

Quote:
Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast View Post
Someone is supposed to buy the MS6 this weekend for about $2500 more than I have in it. Gotta sell right?
Unless you have some type of emotional attachment... I would sell.


But you are talking to a guy that once sold his new tennis shoes at a profit during a birthday party and went home barefoot when I was about 13 YO.
__________________
Everybody has a gameplan....until they get punched in the mouth.
Appreciate 3
upstatedoc4791.00
Dang3r4676.00

      03-12-2020, 02:07 PM   #3485
FuriouslyFast
Banned
United_States
821
Rep
378
Posts

Drives: Miss Daisy
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rmtt View Post
Unless you have some type of emotional attachment... I would sell.


But you are talking to a guy that once sold his new tennis shoes at a profit during a birthday party and went home barefoot when I was about 13 YO.
I do have one. I just bought the car back, but have not driven it since.

I could always buy another one that already has a big turbo etc. That's what I always wanted to do with mine anyway...
Appreciate 1
Rmtt8036.50

      03-13-2020, 04:58 AM   #3486
Dang3r
Schmollbraten
Dang3r's Avatar
Germany
4676
Rep
1,591
Posts

Drives: M4CPC
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Liandri Central Core

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rmtt View Post
But you are talking to a guy that once sold his new tennis shoes at a profit during a birthday party and went home barefoot when I was about 13 YO.
Did you got slapped or applauded for this by your parents?
__________________
M4CP - ZX12R LE - GPZ750 Turbo

I///M the infidel, your BMW-dealer had warned you about
Appreciate 1
Rmtt8036.50

      03-13-2020, 06:19 AM   #3487
Rmtt
Colonel
Rmtt's Avatar
United_States
8037
Rep
2,198
Posts

Drives: 2011 BMW 128i, 2008 LS3 C6
Join Date: Jan 2019
Location: South Carolina

iTrader: (3)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dang3r View Post
Did you got slapped or applauded for this by your parents?

Good question.....actually I had bought them with my own money. I was working odd jobs around our small little town for cash when I was around that age. Mowing lawns, working on some farms, etc.

Can't remember the shoe, but it was the "thing" to have back then. I had bought a pair and worn them to a friends BD party. They sold out quick and a guy there that happened to wear my size bought them from me.

I was staying at my cousin's house during that weekend which was the next street over.

So I walked back barefoot.
__________________
Everybody has a gameplan....until they get punched in the mouth.
Appreciate 1
Dang3r4676.00

      03-13-2020, 08:43 AM   #3488
FuriouslyFast
Banned
United_States
821
Rep
378
Posts

Drives: Miss Daisy
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Quote:
Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast View Post
I do have one. I just bought the car back, but have not driven it since.

I could always buy another one that already has a big turbo etc. That's what I always wanted to do with mine anyway...
But I doubt I'll have the patience to pull the interior to dye it black again or do the carbon vinyl wrap on the console etc again

Also, I will need to find another car between now & Hellcat lease end if I sell the MS6.

Last edited by FuriouslyFast; 03-13-2020 at 10:52 AM..
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 06:35 PM   #3489
FuriouslyFast
Banned
United_States
821
Rep
378
Posts

Drives: Miss Daisy
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Well, I have only seen one person wearing a mask so I guess all the jackasses that bought em all wanted to make some $.

Also, I overheard a jackass older guy today complaining the gym is closed blah blah. We have bigger problems, guy. Is your IQ -44?
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 06:37 PM   #3490
FuriouslyFast
Banned
United_States
821
Rep
378
Posts

Drives: Miss Daisy
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
On a fun note, I installed a MBC & o2 signal modifier on my MSM over the weekend & it's a whole new car. Even more fun + more powa! 9psi now. Stock ECU can't handle more than 10.5 so anymore is really futile.
Attached Images
 
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 06:40 PM   #3491
dinonz
Colonel
United_States
2294
Rep
2,363
Posts

Drives: 2016 M3 MWM ZCP
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Austin

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast View Post
Well, I have only seen one person wearing a mask so I guess all the jackasses that bought em all wanted to make some $.

Also, I overheard a jackass older guy today complaining the gym is closed blah blah. We have bigger problems, guy. Is your IQ -44?
I heard people complaining that Cars and Coffee was cancelled. I mean really?

Also on a car group I belong to they asked "given current situation will you still attend car events" - 307 have said yes, 82 said no, with an additional 47 people replying "hell yes!".

Sadly they're probably all young and likely to survive, but I wonder how they will feel when they bring it home and kill grandma with it...
Appreciate 2
      03-16-2020, 06:42 PM   #3492
FuriouslyFast
Banned
United_States
821
Rep
378
Posts

Drives: Miss Daisy
Join Date: Jul 2019
Location: PA

iTrader: (0)

Garage List
Quote:
Originally Posted by dinonz View Post
I heard people complaining that Cars and Coffee was cancelled. I mean really?

Also on a car group I belong to they asked "given current situation will you still attend car events" - 307 have said yes, 82 said no, with an additional 47 people replying "hell yes!".

Sadly they're probably all young and likely to survive, but I wonder how they will feel when they bring it home and kill grandma with it...
I can see still going to an outdoor car show, though. But ONLY if you're spectating b/c you can make sure you are at least 6 feet from people. Unless it's one of those stupid crowded big shows. If so, stay home.
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 06:49 PM   #3493
dinonz
Colonel
United_States
2294
Rep
2,363
Posts

Drives: 2016 M3 MWM ZCP
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Austin

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast View Post
I can see still going to an outdoor car show, though. But ONLY if you're spectating b/c you can make sure you are at least 6 feet from people. Unless it's one of those stupid crowded big shows. If so, stay home.
Cars and Coffee in Austin gets pretty crowded - but it's not just staying away from people, it's not touching anything. That virus can survive 12 hours on a hard surface like a car, 1 hour on cardboard.
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 06:51 PM   #3494
Turkish Pickle
i showed you my exhaust, answer me
Turkish Pickle's Avatar
United_States
2053
Rep
201
Posts

Drives: MKS V6 AWD - F10 525d xDrive
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Chicagoland

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by dinonz View Post
I heard people complaining that Cars and Coffee was cancelled. I mean really?

Also on a car group I belong to they asked "given current situation will you still attend car events" - 307 have said yes, 82 said no, with an additional 47 people replying "hell yes!".

Sadly they're probably all young and likely to survive, but I wonder how they will feel when they bring it home and kill grandma with it...
I'm considering going on a COVID-19 Cruise next week...
If we die I think we should be going out doing fun stuff and not dreading my existence in a 800 sqft apartment.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MKSixer View Post
In fact, I was young, dumb and full of cum but emptied quite often.
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 06:55 PM   #3495
dinonz
Colonel
United_States
2294
Rep
2,363
Posts

Drives: 2016 M3 MWM ZCP
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Austin

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle View Post
I'm considering going on a COVID-19 Cruise next week...
If we die I think we should be going out doing fun stuff and not dreading my existence in a 800 sqft apartment.
You are young and healthy, you'd probably end up "mildly sick" from it, recover, and you will probably be immune the next time it strikes in 10 years. I say go for it! Especially on a cruise where you're not taking it home to grandma who probably won't recover from it.
Appreciate 1
      03-16-2020, 06:58 PM   #3496
Turkish Pickle
i showed you my exhaust, answer me
Turkish Pickle's Avatar
United_States
2053
Rep
201
Posts

Drives: MKS V6 AWD - F10 525d xDrive
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Chicagoland

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by dinonz View Post
You are young and healthy, you'd probably end up "mildly sick" from it, recover, and you will probably be immune the next time it strikes in 10 years. I say go for it! Especially on a cruise where you're not taking it home to grandma who probably won't recover from it.
As stupid as it sounds, I figured I'd be fine because it seems like people won't even step out of their cars just using Zello or something for the cruise.

Plus grand parents have been out of the picture for at least 10 years now and with parents being 6000 miles away and lectures being online the oldest person I get to interact with nowadays is myself in the mirror
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MKSixer View Post
In fact, I was young, dumb and full of cum but emptied quite often.
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 06:59 PM   #3497
dinonz
Colonel
United_States
2294
Rep
2,363
Posts

Drives: 2016 M3 MWM ZCP
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Austin

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle View Post
As stupid as it sounds, I figured I'd be fine because it seems like people won't even step out of their cars just using Zello or something for the cruise.

Plus grand parents have been out of the picture for at least 10 years now and with parents being 6000 miles away and lectures being online the oldest person I get to interact with nowadays is myself in the mirror
Hang on - what sort of cruise are you talking here? What's Zello?
Appreciate 0
      03-16-2020, 07:15 PM   #3498
Turkish Pickle
i showed you my exhaust, answer me
Turkish Pickle's Avatar
United_States
2053
Rep
201
Posts

Drives: MKS V6 AWD - F10 525d xDrive
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Chicagoland

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by dinonz View Post
Hang on - what sort of cruise are you talking here? What's Zello?
A drive with the boys
Zello is this push to talk app that basically converts your phone to a walkie talkie


Did you think I was talking about a ship-cruise?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MKSixer View Post
In fact, I was young, dumb and full of cum but emptied quite often.
Appreciate 1
Post Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:33 PM.




5post
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
1Addicts.com, BIMMERPOST.com, E90Post.com, F30Post.com, M3Post.com, ZPost.com, 5Post.com, 6Post.com, 7Post.com, XBimmers.com logo and trademark are properties of BIMMERPOST