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      10-09-2020, 02:05 PM   #111
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Originally Posted by Alfisti View Post
I will never, ever understand kids sleeping with their parents, it's just a terrible idea on so many fronts and sets the stage for needy and scared kids.
Every kid is different, parenthood shouldnt be a militant black and white thing, My eldest daughter (now 10) went through periods where she could only sleep well with us, we could force her to stay in her bed, but the morning after you could see she would be tired, anxious and just not herself... why make her suffer just so you can sleep alone with your wife? So we allowed her to do it but we reminded her its not forever, within months eventually she started coming into our bed later and later into the night, now she never does and sleeps full nights on her own no problem. There has to be a little flexibility for their peace of mind. My middle son is different, he is robotically programmed to come to our bed between 1-2am, like clockwork, we can walk him back to bed every night, but within 10-30 minutes he'll sleepwalk right back.... he's not a normal case though as he's an aspie (aspergers). My youngest daughter went through a few months where she walked into our bed, but it was rare, when she did we welcomed her because it was a case of having a bad dream or having an anxious day, again we also had the talk with her that its fine, but not forever type deal, and she sleeps in her bed all night now reliably.

Being militant about it can raise emotional issues in the future CREATING that need for dependance, so in my opinion being reasonable and somewhat flexible can go a long way. As with anything, no two kids are alike, again emphasizing on the flexibility part.
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      10-09-2020, 03:12 PM   #112
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You lucked out a bit, basically everyone I know couldn't get their kid out of the parents bed until they were like 10. Kids can sleep alone, they just need a comfort toy they trust. You're caring for a difficult kid all day and then you have to deal with him/her occupying space in the bed and treading on eggshells so you don't wake her is you need to get up or whatever, just massive headaches.
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