She wants me to drive the 335i while she drives my daily driver

Gregrobin · 09-27-2021, 12:09 PM

GFs car was recently rear ended. It's in the body/collision shop for repairs. It's going to take 10 days longer to repair than originally estimated. She's in a rental car, other drivers insurance is paying, but she has to pay $20 a day for the Collision Damage Waiver since she does not have Comp/Collision coverage on her car. I convinced her to remove it about a year ago since her car is only worth $5000+-.

She asked if she could return the rental car to save $200 ($20 x 10 days) and use my daily driver, and I drive the 335i as a daily driver. Anxiety rushed over me. The 335i sits in the garage, does not see wet roads, was never meant to be a daily driver. I even recently removed all of the surface rust from the brakes/calipers/rotors. More anxiety rushes over me...

I told her I would pay the $200. She said I am being ridiculous and selfish. The conversation got a little more heated...that was Saturday.

What would you do?

Nachbar · 09-27-2021, 12:12 PM

I don't let my wife drive my Cars. Never.

shoei · 09-27-2021, 12:16 PM

You offered to cover her rental costs. Seems reasonable.

Same token, unless your 335 is some heavily modified (engine wise not cosmetic) vehicle or a track specific car, I don't see the harm in you driving your car as well. I'd take care of my woman but that's me.

I'm more concerned that you came up with a reasonable solution but your gf is adamant she wishes to drive your daily. What's the daily btw? If it's something luxurious then I'd be concerned about your gf's thought process.

There's too many intangibles and not enough info for me. Personally? I wouldn't want to deal with all this drama. It's too much drama for something that sounds so minuscule.

nicked8 · 09-27-2021, 12:20 PM

She should respect the fact that the 335i is important enough to you that you don't want it to be used as a DD when there are other options. She doesn't have to understand the thought process or agree with it, but should just respect it.

It's worth $200 to you to keep it in the garage instead - great. What's the difference to her? She'll still get to where she needs to go with no money out of her pocket.

Would she wear fancy $1000 shoes out in the rain just because you liked the way they looked and wanted her to wear them but in her mind they would be ruined?

(No idea if your GF cares about fancy shoes, just a random example where she might be able to relate)

Gregrobin · 09-27-2021, 12:43 PM

My daily driver is a Toyota Highlander.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nicked8

Would she wear fancy $1000 shoes out in the rain just because you liked the way they looked and wanted her to wear them but in her mind they would be ruined?

(No idea if your GF cares about fancy shoes, just a random example where she might be able to relate)

Good analogy. She is super super frugal, which is one of the many things I like about her, so no fancy shoes for her. It's one reason I don't think she understand my 335i, why I have 2 cars, why I spend money on it, etc.

I should add, daily driving to me is to/from the club/gym for tennis/workout 2-3 times a week as I now work from home. Maybe an occasional trip to run an errand. Which is part of her argument, what's the big deal. She volunteered to come home from work if I needed to go somewhere and it was raining.

davidvan05 · 09-27-2021, 12:53 PM

I never really understood buying a nice car and not being able to drive it whenever you want. It's like the car owns you.

omasou · 09-27-2021, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gregrobin

GFs car was recently rear ended. It's in the body/collision shop for repairs. It's going to take 10 days longer to repair than originally estimated. She's in a rental car, other drivers insurance is paying, but she has to pay $20 a day for the Collision Damage Waiver since she does not have Comp/Collision coverage on her car. I convinced her to remove it about a year ago since her car is only worth $5000+-.

She asked if she could return the rental car to save $200 ($20 x 10 days) and use my daily driver, and I drive the 335i as a daily driver. Anxiety rushed over me. The 335i sits in the garage, does not see wet roads, was never meant to be a daily driver. I even recently removed all of the surface rust from the brakes/calipers/rotors. More anxiety rushes over me...

I told her I would pay the $200. She said I am being ridiculous and selfish. The conversation got a little more heated...that was Saturday.

What would you do?

1. Rental is a separate line item from comp and/or collision. At least for me.
2. Get a new girlfriend, you've seen a sign of things to come!

G35POPPEDMYCHERRY · 09-27-2021, 12:58 PM

honestly tell her to drive the rental and dont back down on this. but honestly man idgaf about my f8x anymore, its not a la Ferrari. still its ur car and I would not back down on this

Gregrobin · 09-27-2021, 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by omasou

1. Rental is a separate line item from comp and/or collision. At least for me.

It's comp/collision covered on the rental car. It carries over from your car's comp/collision insurance, if you have it. She does not. So she can either pay for it and be covered, or not pay for and take the risk. She was not at fault so the other drivers insurance is paying for all repairs, and the rental, but does not pay for insurance on the rental.

wtwo3 · 09-27-2021, 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by davidvan05

I never really understood buying a nice car and not being able to drive it whenever you want. It's like the car owns you.

I totally understand it. If it's a new car and not in limited production, then by all means drive it all you want. But if it's either a) limited production or b) a car that's no longer in production and you have an emotional attachment to it and hope it one day becomes a classic, then you won't want to drive it all the time.

Gregrobin · 09-27-2021, 01:02 PM

And yes, to some degree I feel it's ridiculous, likes it's just a car., what's the big deal. It's my pride and joy though, my toy, lots of sweat equity in it. Yes, there is an emotional attachment to it I can't quite explain.

shoei · 09-27-2021, 01:06 PM

This shouldn't be this big of an issue. The real issue is that this is an issue for the both of you.

Gregrobin · 09-27-2021, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shoei

This shouldn't be this big of an issue. The real issue is that this is an issue for the both of you.

Agreed, not looking for counseling on our relationship though, more of a "what would you do post" ;-)

I get your point though, and appreciate it.

tcphoto · 09-27-2021, 01:10 PM

Is she going to spend the $200 on a new handbag or shoes? As posted previously, this could be a sign of things to come and I wouldn't play that game.

Gregrobin · 09-27-2021, 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tcphoto

Is she going to spend the $200 on a new handbag or shoes? As posted previously, this could be a sign of things to come and I wouldn't play that game.

No, not her style, she would pay the rental car company with it.

P1 · 09-27-2021, 01:16 PM

I have a wife, not a girlfriend, so perhaps it's different, but she drives whatever she wants to, whenever she wants to.

Your girl > your car.

Gregrobin · 09-27-2021, 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by P1

I have a wife, not a girlfriend, so perhaps it's different, but she drives whatever she wants to, whenever she wants to.

Your girl > your car.

I let her drive the 335i whenever she wants to, which is rare. In fact I ask her to drive it to have fun. But it's not a daily driver, was never meant to be.

F30lolz · 09-27-2021, 01:26 PM

How long have you two been together and are you living together?

nyalpine90 · 09-27-2021, 01:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gregrobin

I let her drive the 335i whenever she wants to, which is rare. In fact I ask her to drive it to have fun. But it's not a daily driver, was never meant to be.

its only for couple of days, besides cars were build to be driven.
a car sitting without no action, is not good either.

Tommy-G · 09-27-2021, 01:30 PM

I have let me wife drive my cars since the day she moved in with me.
IT'S JUST A CAR.....she crashed it one day and called me crying thinking I was going to scream at her. I told her I would send our tow company. Then I called and cancelled her hair appointment that she wasnt going to make. I think that sealed the deal for her...she thought I was going to lose my mind but I called to cancel her hair appointment instead.

IT'S JUST A CAR......eventhough it was an individual pkg E46 only one its color in the country but IT WAS JUST A CAR!

Pauldunlop13 · 09-27-2021, 01:39 PM

agreed that you driving the 335 for a short time - (10days is really not that much), is prob better for the car, than letting it sit

if the repair was going to be a month or more, I would then understand your point

damnitBobby · 09-27-2021, 01:40 PM

All over $20 per day for 10 days? You should put things into perspective and let her know with all the shortages she’s actually getting an amazing rental price.

If she still doesn’t understand that then we are approaching relationship advice. That’s not my expertise so I’ll let others chime in concerning that.

09-27-2021, 12:09 PM	#1
Gregrobin Captain 583 Rep 603 Posts Drives: 2008 E93 335i Join Date: Dec 2020 Location: Vir ginny ya iTrader: (0)	She wants me to drive the 335i while she drives my daily driver GFs car was recently rear ended. It's in the body/collision shop for repairs. It's going to take 10 days longer to repair than originally estimated. She's in a rental car, other drivers insurance is paying, but she has to pay $20 a day for the Collision Damage Waiver since she does not have Comp/Collision coverage on her car. I convinced her to remove it about a year ago since her car is only worth $5000+-. She asked if she could return the rental car to save $200 ($20 x 10 days) and use my daily driver, and I drive the 335i as a daily driver. Anxiety rushed over me. The 335i sits in the garage, does not see wet roads, was never meant to be a daily driver. I even recently removed all of the surface rust from the brakes/calipers/rotors. More anxiety rushes over me... I told her I would pay the $200. She said I am being ridiculous and selfish. The conversation got a little more heated...that was Saturday. What would you do? __________________ VRSF Performance Intake Kit / XS Power Charge Pipe V2 / ARM 5" Intercooler FMIC / MHD Stage 2 V10 / FTP N54 PCV Valve / VRSF 3" Catless Downpipes / xHP Stage 1
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09-27-2021, 12:12 PM	#2
Nachbar Captain 8164 Rep 678 Posts Drives: i8 Join Date: Jul 2015 Location: Switzerland iTrader: (0)	I don't let my wife drive my Cars. Never.
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09-27-2021, 12:16 PM	#3
shoei Banned 7777 Rep 2,601 Posts Drives: MW Vespa w/pink racing stripes Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Peeing in your garden iTrader: (3)	You offered to cover her rental costs. Seems reasonable. Same token, unless your 335 is some heavily modified (engine wise not cosmetic) vehicle or a track specific car, I don't see the harm in you driving your car as well. I'd take care of my woman but that's me. I'm more concerned that you came up with a reasonable solution but your gf is adamant she wishes to drive your daily. What's the daily btw? If it's something luxurious then I'd be concerned about your gf's thought process. There's too many intangibles and not enough info for me. Personally? I wouldn't want to deal with all this drama. It's too much drama for something that sounds so minuscule.
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09-27-2021, 12:20 PM	#4
nicked8 Private First Class 104 Rep 144 Posts Drives: 2013 E92 335i M-Sport xDrive Join Date: Aug 2019 Location: CT/NY iTrader: (0)	She should respect the fact that the 335i is important enough to you that you don't want it to be used as a DD when there are other options. She doesn't have to understand the thought process or agree with it, but should just respect it. It's worth $200 to you to keep it in the garage instead - great. What's the difference to her? She'll still get to where she needs to go with no money out of her pocket. Would she wear fancy $1000 shoes out in the rain just because you liked the way they looked and wanted her to wear them but in her mind they would be ruined? (No idea if your GF cares about fancy shoes, just a random example where she might be able to relate)
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09-27-2021, 12:53 PM	#6
davidvan05 Enlisted Member 44 Rep 30 Posts Drives: 2008 m3 Join Date: Sep 2017 Location: Prospect Heights. IL iTrader: (0)	I never really understood buying a nice car and not being able to drive it whenever you want. It's like the car owns you.
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09-27-2021, 12:58 PM	#8
G35POPPEDMYCHERRY Banned 5006 Rep 4,135 Posts Drives: F80 Join Date: Dec 2015 Location: Philadelphia iTrader: (1)	honestly tell her to drive the rental and dont back down on this. but honestly man idgaf about my f8x anymore, its not a la Ferrari. still its ur car and I would not back down on this
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09-27-2021, 01:02 PM	#11
Gregrobin Captain 583 Rep 603 Posts Drives: 2008 E93 335i Join Date: Dec 2020 Location: Vir ginny ya iTrader: (0)	And yes, to some degree I feel it's ridiculous, likes it's just a car., what's the big deal. It's my pride and joy though, my toy, lots of sweat equity in it. Yes, there is an emotional attachment to it I can't quite explain. __________________ VRSF Performance Intake Kit / XS Power Charge Pipe V2 / ARM 5" Intercooler FMIC / MHD Stage 2 V10 / FTP N54 PCV Valve / VRSF 3" Catless Downpipes / xHP Stage 1
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09-27-2021, 01:06 PM	#12
shoei Banned 7777 Rep 2,601 Posts Drives: MW Vespa w/pink racing stripes Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Peeing in your garden iTrader: (3)	This shouldn't be this big of an issue. The real issue is that this is an issue for the both of you.
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09-27-2021, 01:10 PM	#14
tcphoto Brigadier General 4141 Rep 3,240 Posts Drives: E92 335i 6MT Coupe Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Nashville, TN iTrader: (1)	Is she going to spend the $200 on a new handbag or shoes? As posted previously, this could be a sign of things to come and I wouldn't play that game. __________________
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09-27-2021, 01:16 PM	#16
P1 Lieutenant General 11727 Rep 11,191 Posts Drives: 2004 3/4 ton Duramax Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: United States iTrader: (1)	I have a wife, not a girlfriend, so perhaps it's different, but she drives whatever she wants to, whenever she wants to. Your girl > your car.
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09-27-2021, 01:30 PM	#20
Tommy-G Captain 4605 Rep 694 Posts Drives: 2015 435 Vert Alpine White Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Bradenton FL iTrader: (0)	I have let me wife drive my cars since the day she moved in with me. IT'S JUST A CAR.....she crashed it one day and called me crying thinking I was going to scream at her. I told her I would send our tow company. Then I called and cancelled her hair appointment that she wasnt going to make. I think that sealed the deal for her...she thought I was going to lose my mind but I called to cancel her hair appointment instead. IT'S JUST A CAR......eventhough it was an individual pkg E46 only one its color in the country but IT WAS JUST A CAR!
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09-27-2021, 01:39 PM	#21
Pauldunlop13 Second Lieutenant 425 Rep 291 Posts Drives: M4 Convertible Join Date: Sep 2017 Location: Colorado iTrader: (1)	agreed that you driving the 335 for a short time - (10days is really not that much), is prob better for the car, than letting it sit if the repair was going to be a month or more, I would then understand your point __________________ 2019 YMB ZCP convertible with Dinan Exhaust 2011 Ducati Diavel Carbon Edition 2015 BSM M4 Convertible - 2018-2019 2016 228Xi - 2017-2018 2003 Acura RSX Type S 2003-2017
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09-27-2021, 01:40 PM	#22
damnitBobby Major 1003 Rep 1,374 Posts Drives: 2018 M3 ZCP Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Houston iTrader: (0)	All over $20 per day for 10 days? You should put things into perspective and let her know with all the shortages she’s actually getting an amazing rental price. If she still doesn’t understand that then we are approaching relationship advice. That’s not my expertise so I’ll let others chime in concerning that.
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