Why do people use the term "my partner"?

[happyjack]

Originally Posted by DocL

I don't mind the term partner. A lot of my older patients use it as they are a widow and in a new relaionship. It seems out of place to use boyfriend/girlfriend when you are in your 70s, 80s, or yes, your 90s.

Originally Posted by vreihen16

Fear of commitment, and/or fear of wedding cake.....

these comments resonate the most for me and "justify" the use of the term. although i dont feel like i'm hearing it any more than i used to. that could also be that we have very well-established circle of friends, and even the single ones rarely use labels for the people they introduce to the group.

i also hear older (60 yr+) people use the word "companion".

i always thought "significant other" was odd and unwieldy.

regardless, put me in the camp of calling yourself WETFUW

[David70]

Originally Posted by tranquility

Why do ppl find the traditional terms offensive?

It was so puzzling when ppl started calling both fe/male thespians as 'actors', as if the word 'actress' was demeaning? Insanity.

Why do you care what terms they use, whether girlfriend, partner or actors?

Seems like you are the one that is offended because they aren't using the terms you prefer.

[tranquility]

Originally Posted by David70

Why do you care what terms they use, whether girlfriend, partner or actors?

Seems like you are the one that is offended because they aren't using the terms you prefer.

Why are you so offended by my post? If you reread, I really don't care what ppl use as per my former post (esp the partner one).

However, I just find it's confusing that fe/males were both referred to as 'actors': it's just silly, and that's why they got rid of that pronto.

Stop imagining conflict where there's none.

[David70]

Originally Posted by tranquility

Why are you so offended by my post? If you reread, I really don't care what ppl use as per my former post (esp the partner one).

However, I just find it's confusing that fe/males were both referred to as 'actors': it's just silly, and that's why they got rid of that pronto.

Stop imagining conflict where there's none.

You asked why people find the traditional terms offensive. - Who is this? Someone introduces their girlfriend and others get offended? Not following

You called the term "Actors" "Insanity" - Why is this insanity? It made me think you must care.

Glad to hear you really don't care about any of this, I guess I misunderstood your post. Thanks.

[tranquility]

Originally Posted by David70

You asked why people find the traditional terms offensive. - Who is this? Someone introduces their girlfriend and others get offended? Not following

You called the term "Actors" "Insanity" - Why is this insanity? It made me think you must care.

Glad to hear you really don't care about any of this, I guess I misunderstood your post. Thanks.

Ya, that's the prb w typing/the internet, sometimes it's hard to really convey/understand one's true meaning/intention.

I'm not 'up-in-arms' about the 'actor' thing haha, I just thought that it was silly and confusing, and I guess the Academy agrees since they done away w that after a short trial run.

I'm totally cool w 'partner' or whatever, but my question was why anyone would be offended w the traditional terms in the first place...and presumably that's why this terminology was introduced as a replacement? I suppose this change makes sense for same-sex couples, but I'm not sure about others.
Ofc, as others have explained, if one is not married, then there aren't many other choices, or it may be a better alternative to bf/gf. Who knows, I'm just curious is all.

[David70]

Originally Posted by tranquility

Ya, that's the prb w typing/the internet, sometimes it's hard to really convey/understand one's true meaning/intention.

I'm not 'up-in-arms' about the 'actor' thing haha, I just thought that it was silly and confusing, and I guess the Academy agrees since they done away w that after a short trial run.

I'm totally cool w 'partner' or whatever, but my question was why anyone would be offended w the traditional terms in the first place...and presumably that's why this terminology was introduced as a replacement? I suppose this change makes sense for same-sex couples, but I'm not sure about others.
Ofc, as others have explained, if one is not married, then there aren't many other choices, or it may be a better alternative to bf/gf. Who knows, I'm just curious is all.

I don't see anyone being offended by the traditional terms except the two directly involved. I could see a 45 year old woman that has been with her boyfriend/partner for 15 years, 3 kids, a house, working on retirement planning together, a long term commitment (but not marriage) not wanting to be called "girlfriend" which is the same term that applies to the girl a 21 year old guy met last weekend.

[shawnhayes]

Originally Posted by David70

People use it because they want to, others seem to be offended by it. I have no idea why. I think it is funny when people say I am liberal because I don't care what people call themselves. Just not something I care about, if this makes me liberal, or people feel better by calling me liberal I am good with it also.

There is no need for you to be sorry about not wanting to use it, nobody is asking you to and it isn't a term that fits your situation as you are married.

If liberal means I'm not so much of an assh*** that I REQUIRE you to use my terminology to describe your life, then yeah, so am I.

I don't understand why our current society is so "okay" with Karen's running around trying to boss everybody over what to do. Way back in the day, rude people were shunned. Now they're everywhere.

Shawn

[///d]

Originally Posted by tranquility

Ya, that's the prb w typing/the internet, sometimes it's hard to really convey/understand one's true meaning/intention.

I'm not 'up-in-arms' about the 'actor' thing haha, I just thought that it was silly and confusing, and I guess the Academy agrees since they done away w that after a short trial run.

I'm totally cool w 'partner' or whatever, but my question was why anyone would be offended w the traditional terms in the first place...and presumably that's why this terminology was introduced as a replacement? I suppose this change makes sense for same-sex couples, but I'm not sure about others.
Ofc, as others have explained, if one is not married, then there aren't many other choices, or it may be a better alternative to bf/gf. Who knows, I'm just curious is all.

Originally Posted by David70

I don't see anyone being offended by the traditional terms except the two directly involved. I could see a 45 year old woman that has been with her boyfriend/partner for 15 years, 3 kids, a house, working on retirement planning together, a long term commitment (but not marriage) not wanting to be called "girlfriend" which is the same term that applies to the girl a 21 year old guy met last weekend.

Yeah I don't know that anyone is really offended, I think it's more of an upbringing thing for a lot of us. There are def folks out there that will be offended if you don't use what they find proper. Those are the types I can't stand and I don't have time for.

Sorry I called you ma'am, but if you look like a woman, talk like a woman, dress like a woman... well

[tranquility]

As a segue, you know what I find funny about Yankeeland? That the word 'liberal' carries an almost derogatory meaning lol.

[happyjack]

Originally Posted by tranquility

As a segue, you know what I find funny about Yankeeland? That the word 'liberal' carries an almost derogatory meaning lol.

tht's because the 24-hour news and talk show cycle have made everyone forget that it has a meaning that has nothing to do with politics.

[The Libertine]

Originally Posted by ///d

Yeah I don't know that anyone is really offended, I think it's more of an upbringing thing for a lot of us. There are def folks out there that will be offended if you don't use what they find proper. Those are the types I can't stand and I don't have time for.

Sorry I called you ma'am, but if you look like a woman, talk like a woman, dress like a woman... well

And probably sign their name with the (she/her/hers) identifier too…

[tranquility]

Originally Posted by The Libertine

And probably sign their name with the (she/her/hers) identifier too…

LMAO, don't get me started w those....I could understand it if they were necessary as others aren't really sure lol.

So lame and so awkward and just plain weird (but, again, they can do whatever they want).

[Theruleslawyer]

I always assumed it was because they were a cowboy.

[dreamingat30fps]

I've been with my girlfriend for 18 years. Not married. 99% of the time I will refer to her as my girlfriend. On the rare occasion I feel the need to emphasize the seriousness of our relationship I just say she's my wife. No ones has ever asked to see proof.

[gatorfast]

I also hear partner a lot now and find it a bit odd. When I hear the word partner my thought goes to a business partner or some type of business arrangement. Boyfriend/girlfriend denotes romantic relationship. Partner denotes business relationship.

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by zx10guy

What I'm going to say is probably going to piss off some people, but the term partner has come about with the whole woke movement and betatization of men. Why the term partner is being pushed is because of the narrative to make a man and a women totally equal and not recognizing there ARE differences in what each brings to a relationship. A man brings certain things into a relationship and a woman brings certain things into a relationship. Together those things should compliment. If you don't want to use the normal terms as boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, then I prefer to use couple or significant other.

Lol, you're so triggered.

I've rarely heard it outside of an LGBTQ context, never really care to know why when I did because what someone calls their partner is of no consequence to me.

[dreamingat30fps]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Lol, you're so triggered.

I've rarely heard it outside of an LGBTQ context, never really care to know why when I did because what someone calls their partner is of no consequence to me.

Of course it does. It's ambiguous, the consequence is that you could be left with the wrong idea of the relationship. Maybe you think they are business partners when they are actually romantically involved. Maybe you think they are romantically involved when in fact they are just business partners. Then you have all the secondary consequences that could come from having that wrong information.

Now amongst themselves I would agree it's inconsequential. They can call themselves booboo for all I care, but that's not what we're talking about here.

[vreihen16]

Maybe "life partner" should be used for non-business relationships?????

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Theruleslawyer

I always assumed it was because they were a cowboy.

Technically, then it would be "parDner"

[Theruleslawyer]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

Technically, then it would be "parDner"

That's really just to represent the Texas dialect. Wonder if they spelled it that way in period?

[wrickem]

Same-sex repping here - 37 years together with 4 (straight) kids. Before gay marriage was legal in all 50 states, we always used “partner in crime” to introduce each other

We’ve had gay and straight friends introduce their other half as their “lover”. THAT makes me cringe way more than partner.

[Esteban]

Originally Posted by wrickem

We’ve had gay and straight friends introduce their other half as their “lover”. THAT makes me cringe way more than partner.

Yeah! It paints a picture in your head that you probably don't want to see.

PS - note that I said "probably."