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      05-12-2015, 07:52 AM   #1
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Dating: Coming on too strong?

I feel weird about going on a second date with a guy I have been talking to for two weeks. We had an AMAZING first date. I mean the best I've ever been on. We have our second date lined up for this Friday but I was the one who initiated both dates.........Do you guys see that as an issue? I feel like I'm coming on too strong here.


I dont know how to do this anymore.


Fuck it, I'm going to end up as a cat lady.
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      05-12-2015, 07:55 AM   #2
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One thing I've learned while dating is that you can never have expectations on what you think should be "normal". I've had to reach out to women to go on dates, and then theres others that reached out to me consistently, but I prefer a balance. I wouldn't consider it a bad thing by any means, but I do tend to read between the lines. If I find myself making all the moves to go out with someone, I'll usually tell them I'm not feeling it and be on my way. I don't really care for things to be one sided, I have my own life to live, I don't need to schedule things all the time.

The dates may go well, but look at it down the road. It's probably likely he may be like that with other things in life, which would be frustrating for me. Some people don't mind, but I do.

Dating sucks. It's cool getting out and meeting people, but it's really kind of scary how many different nuances there are that people exhibit that I couldn't live with. In the moment, it's fun, but in the long run, not so much.
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      05-12-2015, 07:55 AM   #3
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LOL!
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      05-12-2015, 08:00 AM   #4
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Sara504 How are the phone conversations? Is he a little cocky/arrogant? If so then he is used to being asked out on a date. He 'expects it'. I'm speaking from experience, growing up, girls were the ones that approached me. So after a while, i got used to it.
There is nothing to worry about. Just be straight forward with him and tell him you want a relationship, if he acts funny then forget him and move on.
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      05-12-2015, 08:01 AM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
One thing I've learned while dating is that you can never have expectations on what you think should be "normal". I've had to reach out to women to go on dates, and then theres others that reached out to me consistently, but I prefer a balance. I wouldn't consider it a bad thing by any means, but I do tend to read between the lines. If I find myself making all the moves to go out with someone, I'll usually tell them I'm not feeling it and be on my way. I don't really care for things to be one sided, I have my own life to live, I don't need to schedule things all the time.

The dates may go well, but look at it down the road. It's probably likely he may be like that with other things in life, which would be frustrating for me. Some people don't mind, but I do.

Dating sucks. It's cool getting out and meeting people, but it's really kind of scary how many different nuances there are that people exhibit that I couldn't live with. In the moment, it's fun, but in the long run, not so much.
So I should go on the second date then and then wait and see if he asks me for a third? (I cant believe I'm asking E90post for advice) The ONLY down side to this second date is I dont get to see my daughter all weekend if I go on it.
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      05-12-2015, 08:03 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Whostheboss View Post
Sara504 How are the phone conversations? Is he a little cocky/arrogant? If so then he is used to being asked out on a date. He 'expects it'. I'm speaking from experience, growing up, girls were the ones that approached me. So after a while, i got used to it.
There is nothing to worry about. Just be straight forward with him and tell him you want a relationship, if he acts funny then forget him and move on.
He was in the military and now he's an attorney. Of course he's cocky. lol So its normal for girls to ask out men then?
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      05-12-2015, 08:05 AM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara504 View Post
So I should go on the second date then and then wait and see if he asks me for a third? (I cant believe I'm asking E90post for advice) The ONLY down side to this second date is I dont get to see my daughter all weekend if I go on it.
You should. Like Boss said, I wouldn't completely discount him just because you are setting the dates, some people are used to being asked, not the other way around. It's gone both ways for me, and after a while, if I'm the only one setting dates, I end it, because that's my personal preference, if you don't mind, then more power to you.

Unfortunately, since you are dating as a new-ish mom, you are going to have to take time away from your daughter as rough as it might be, but it's not the end of the world.
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      05-12-2015, 08:07 AM   #8
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Originally Posted by Sara504 View Post
He was in the military and now he's an attorney.
Score!!! Sugar daddy #2. Lets do this slow and bait him in.
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      05-12-2015, 08:08 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
You should. Like Boss said, I wouldn't completely discount him just because you are setting the dates, some people are used to being asked, not the other way around. It's gone both ways for me, and after a while, if I'm the only one setting dates, I end it, because that's my personal preference, if you don't mind, then more power to you.

Unfortunately, since you are dating as a new-ish mom, you are going to have to take time away from your daughter as rough as it might be, but it's not the end of the world.
I let my Mom watch her on our first date, and that was the first night in 10 months that I didnt sleep with my daughter beside.
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      05-12-2015, 08:09 AM   #10
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Originally Posted by Nkc View Post
Score!!! Sugar daddy #2. Lets do this slow and bait him in.
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      05-12-2015, 08:10 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara504 View Post
I let my Mom watch her on our first date, and that was the first night in 10 months that I didnt sleep with my daughter beside.
I'm amazed you woke up alive!


Kidding aside, it will be good for you to get out and enjoy yourself. I'm going to take a wild guess that your mother will do a good job watching her so you can have some fun. Enjoy it. Go on the damn second date.
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      05-12-2015, 08:14 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
I'm amazed you woke up alive!


Kidding aside, it will be good for you to get out and enjoy yourself. I'm going to take a wild guess that your mother will do a good job watching her so you can have some fun. Enjoy it. Go on the damn second date.
ok ok.... I have nothing to wear! Ugh, emergency run to Saks.
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      05-12-2015, 08:16 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara504 View Post
ok ok.... I have nothing to wear! Ugh, emergency run to Saks.
You're giving me a headache. I expected this from the boys on here, but not you. I'm sure you have a closet (or two) full of nice things to wear.




.... women.
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      05-12-2015, 08:21 AM   #14
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MrSugarSkulls, initiate one so she doesn't feel uncomfortable anymore.
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      05-12-2015, 08:26 AM   #15
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If you initiated both dates, i'd wait for him to ask you out on the next date.

And don't text him like 100 times a day.
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      05-12-2015, 08:26 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
You're giving me a headache. I expected this from the boys on here, but not you. I'm sure you have a closet (or two) full of nice things to wear.




.... women.
Three, if you include my shoe closet. I feel like I really need the WOW factor on this date since our first one was just jeans. Or am I over thinking?
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      05-12-2015, 08:28 AM   #17
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Originally Posted by V1.47fan View Post
If you initiated both dates, i'd wait for him to ask you out on the next date.

And don't text him like 100 times a day.
I try not to text during the day since hes working and so am I. I usually text him every morning by now.. I havent yet today.
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      05-12-2015, 08:33 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara504 View Post
Three, if you include my shoe closet. I feel like I really need the WOW factor on this date since our first one was just jeans. Or am I over thinking?
Over thinking. You don't need a wow factor, he likes you enough to go on a second date, so clearly your hideous jeans didn't scare him away. Male minds don't work like female minds, ours are much much much simpler.

Besides, I'm sure he's thinking about what's underneath the clothes, not the clothes themselves.
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      05-12-2015, 08:35 AM   #19
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Originally Posted by Billup View Post
Over thinking. You don't need a wow factor, he likes you enough to go on a second date, so clearly your hideous jeans didn't scare him away. Male minds don't work like female minds, ours are much much much simpler.

Besides, I'm sure he's thinking about what's underneath the clothes, not the clothes themselves.
He doesnt have to think too hard
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      05-12-2015, 08:36 AM   #20
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I try not to text during the day since hes working and so am I. I usually text him every morning by now.. I havent yet today.
I dont know, girl...it just seems like you're more into him or He's just a cool cat.
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      05-12-2015, 08:37 AM   #21
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I dont know, girl...it just seems like you're more into him or He's just a cool cat.
I think so too Thats what this whole thread is about.
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      05-12-2015, 08:49 AM   #22
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I think so too Thats what this whole thread is about.
You need someone like Billup, he's needy, clingy, a great communicator...he'll make you feel like you're the most beautiful woman in the world.

Then again a lot of girls are attracted to cocky assholes that treat em like shit.
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