Is it ever okay to tell someone...

geeslice · 05-26-2006, 01:51 AM

When you are dating people is it ever okay to say "Hey, BTW I am dating other ppl as well" if it is not already understood. Or do you just go about youur business until it comes up?

I'd like to avoid hurting this guys feelings but I get bored while he's studying for the LSATs...

BMW F22 · 05-26-2006, 01:56 AM

dude that's so wrong. Not trying to be harsh here but wut kind of question is that?? Unless u told him upfront that it was gonna be an open relationship, it's just wrong.

geeslice · 05-26-2006, 01:58 AM

But we aren't in a realtionship.

There is no "us". We've gone at 3 dates.

shimshimhada · 05-26-2006, 01:58 AM

Studying to be a lawyer? Tell him, if he can't handle that, he can't handle being an attorney.

geeslice · 05-26-2006, 01:59 AM

He's set himselfupfor failure. Didn't start studying or taking a class until 2 weeks ago and takes it June 12th...

I'm already questioning his intelligence...

shimshimhada · 05-26-2006, 02:00 AM

magmd · 05-26-2006, 02:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

But we aren't in a realtionship.

There is no "us". We've gone at 3 dates.

3 dates?? And you are worried about it?? LOL!

Are you sure he is really studying for the LSAT???

Foo's Girl · 05-26-2006, 02:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

When you are dating people is it ever okay to say "Hey, BTW I am dating other ppl as well" if it is not already understood. Or do you just go about youur business until it comes up?

I'd like to avoid hurting this guys feelings but I get bored while he's studying for the LSATs...

sure its ok, hell, id rather have someone tell me upfront rather than playing a guessing game.

BMW F22 · 05-26-2006, 02:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

But we aren't in a realtionship.

There is no "us". We've gone at 3 dates.

In that case just straight up tell him. It might kill his spirit (he might end up failing haha) but yeah...

Something still intrigues me though. Im betting that you didnt tell him upfront that u guys are just dating- as in just hanging out. On the other hand, he thinks that you 2 are a couple now. Better let him know now then...

geeslice · 05-26-2006, 02:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by magmd

3 dates?? And you are worried about it?? LOL!

Are you sure he is really studying for the LSAT???

Like I said... I like the guy so I want to avoid his feelings.

I tend to approach things like a guy (with an iron fist) so I wanted to check to make sure I'm not being youknowwaht!

geeslice · 05-26-2006, 02:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BMWE90

In that case just straight up tell him. It might kill his spirit (he might end up failing haha) but yeah...

Something still intrigues me though. Im betting that you didnt tell him upfront that u guys are just dating- as in just hanging out. On the other hand, he thinks that you 2 are a couple now. Better let him know now then...

He tried to have "the talk" with me on our third date.

I told him I was commitment phobic...

I never call him. He calls me. He called me tonight to complain about his class which has me concerned he might think something more than I thought it was. (Which is okay because I like him and would like toget to knoe him better.)

magmd · 05-26-2006, 02:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

Like I said... I like the guy so I want to avoid his feelings.

I tend to approach things like a guy (with an iron fist) so I wanted to check to make sure I'm not being youknowwaht!

1. Most guys would hardly consider you two a couple after 3 dates....so, i would not worry about that.

2. Most guys would not like to know that a girl they are spending any amount of time with.....is out banging other guys. Regardless if you have gone on 1 date....or been together for years. So...no way to win that one. If he cares...you automatically become damaged goods.

3. A guy that would not care....is likely a guy you would not like to be with in the long run....so, maybe its better that YOU do not find out how he feels about it.

4. Would you be ok if he told you that he has been banging someone else also this whole time. If yes...then its all kewel.

Best advice........its way to early in the process to tell him everything. What he does not know will not hurt him at this point. Once you guys are an item....no more poking around!

BMW F22 · 05-26-2006, 02:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

He called me tonight to complain about his class which has me concerned he might think something more than I thought it was. (Which is okay because I like him and would like toget to knoe him better.)

his call concerned u? how? is it cus u kinda knew he wanted to give u "the talk" again?

anyways, I guess you're just testing out diff. guys right now. I guess that's okay as long as you're not in a relationship.

BMW F22 · 05-26-2006, 02:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by magmd

1. Most guys would hardly consider you two a couple after 3 dates....so, i would not worry about that.

2. Most guys would not like to know that a girl they are spending any amount of time with.....is out banging other guys. Regardless if you have gone on 1 date....or been together for years. So...no way to win that one. If he cares...you automatically become damaged goods.

3. A guy that would not care....is likely a guy you would not like to be with in the long run....so, maybe its better that YOU do not find out how he feels about it.

4. Would you be ok if he told you that he has been banging someone else also this whole time. If yes...then its all kewel.

Best advice........its way to early in the process to tell him everything. What he does not know will not hurt him at this point. Once you guys are an item....no more poking around!

what he said...

magmd · 05-26-2006, 02:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

He tried to have "the talk" with me on our third date.

I told him I was commitment phobic...

I never call him. He calls me. He called me tonight to complain about his class which has me concerned he might think something more than I thought it was. (Which is okay because I like him and would like toget to knoe him better.)

ahhhhh.....well.....if he is asking for one/one only....then best to tell him that you do not see eye to eye right now.

geeslice · 05-26-2006, 02:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by magmd

1. banging
banging

I'm not "banging" anyone...

Why must youppl call it "BANGING" it's SEX pure and simple...

BMW F22 · 05-26-2006, 02:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

I'm not "banging" anyone...

Why must youppl call it "BANGING" it's SEX pure and simple...

magmd · 05-26-2006, 02:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

I'm not "banging" anyone...

Why must youppl call it "BANGING" it's SEX pure and simple...

Hey....it was you that stated

I tend to approach things like a guy (with an iron fist)

Us people...refer to it in various derrogatory terms........banging being a favorite.

If you want to be pure and simple..........sex to most guys is about our pleasure....and we bang, hit it, and tear that shit up. We hardly ever have sexual intercourse.

Good luck with your buddy.

docbolo · 05-26-2006, 02:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by magmd

Hey....it was you that stated

I tend to approach things like a guy (with an iron fist)

Us people...refer to it in various derrogatory terms........banging being a favorite.

If you want to be pure and simple..........sex to most guys is about our pleasure....and we bang, hit it, and tear that shit up. We hardly ever have sexual intercourse.

Good luck with your buddy.

Dr.mag speaks the truth. If you want things sugarcoated, write to Dear Abby. I suspect you are bored because the wannabe lawyer is not laying the smackdown properly. just my .02

geeslice · 05-26-2006, 02:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by magmd

Hey....it was you that stated

I tend to approach things like a guy (with an iron fist)

Us people...refer to it in various derrogatory terms........banging being a favorite.

If you want to be pure and simple..........sex to most guys is about our pleasure....and we bang, hit it, and tear that shit up. We hardly ever have sexual intercourse.

Good luck with your buddy.

I'll take "f***ing" too... Just not "banging".It sounds too juvinile.

That's allsex is about.. I mean it can be more.But Im not ready for that.I realize it's totally about pleasure...

bringsmewomen · 05-26-2006, 05:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geeslice

When you are dating people is it ever okay to say "Hey, BTW I am dating other ppl as well" if it is not already understood. Or do you just go about youur business until it comes up?

I'd like to avoid hurting this guys feelings but I get bored while he's studying for the LSATs...

I wouldnt say that unless they as or it comes up in conversation. Or you're getting serious with that person. Otherwise there's no reason you have to bring it up.

Nikki · 05-26-2006, 09:36 AM

I don't know, I've never dated more than one person at a time. I think it's a little messed up.

05-26-2006, 01:51 AM	#1
geeslice Second Lieutenant 33 Rep 283 Posts Drives: '06 325xi Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Arlington, VA iTrader: (0) Garage List 2006 325xi [0.00] 2004 Audi TT [0.00]	Is it ever okay to tell someone... When you are dating people is it ever okay to say "Hey, BTW I am dating other ppl as well" if it is not already understood. Or do you just go about youur business until it comes up? I'd like to avoid hurting this guys feelings but I get bored while he's studying for the LSATs... __________________ It's called "HAPPY" Hour for a reason. '06 E90 325xi Sparkling Graphite, Dakota Black Leather, Dark Walnut Burl Trim, Steptronic, Premium Pkg, Cold Weather Pkg, Xenons = LOVE
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05-26-2006, 01:56 AM	#2
BMW F22 Major General 3642 Rep 9,783 Posts Drives: ///M235i Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Bay Area iTrader: (8)	dude that's so wrong. Not trying to be harsh here but wut kind of question is that?? Unless u told him upfront that it was gonna be an open relationship, it's just wrong.
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05-26-2006, 01:58 AM	#3
geeslice Second Lieutenant 33 Rep 283 Posts Drives: '06 325xi Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Arlington, VA iTrader: (0) Garage List 2006 325xi [0.00] 2004 Audi TT [0.00]	But we aren't in a realtionship. There is no "us". We've gone at 3 dates. __________________ It's called "HAPPY" Hour for a reason. '06 E90 325xi Sparkling Graphite, Dakota Black Leather, Dark Walnut Burl Trim, Steptronic, Premium Pkg, Cold Weather Pkg, Xenons = LOVE
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05-26-2006, 01:58 AM	#4
shimshimhada Brigadier General 460 Rep 4,838 Posts Drives: Portal Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Portal iTrader: (2)	Studying to be a lawyer? Tell him, if he can't handle that, he can't handle being an attorney.
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05-26-2006, 01:59 AM	#5
geeslice Second Lieutenant 33 Rep 283 Posts Drives: '06 325xi Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Arlington, VA iTrader: (0) Garage List 2006 325xi [0.00] 2004 Audi TT [0.00]	He's set himselfupfor failure. Didn't start studying or taking a class until 2 weeks ago and takes it June 12th... I'm already questioning his intelligence... __________________ It's called "HAPPY" Hour for a reason. '06 E90 325xi Sparkling Graphite, Dakota Black Leather, Dark Walnut Burl Trim, Steptronic, Premium Pkg, Cold Weather Pkg, Xenons = LOVE
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05-26-2006, 02:00 AM	#6
shimshimhada Brigadier General 460 Rep 4,838 Posts Drives: Portal Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Portal iTrader: (2)
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05-26-2006, 09:36 AM	#22
Nikki Major General 1042 Rep 6,381 Posts Drives: Sepang Z4MC Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: LA iTrader: (9)	I don't know, I've never dated more than one person at a time. I think it's a little messed up. __________________ Nikki
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