Funniest Joke

DasBoost · 09-05-2008, 04:56 PM

The Post Office released a new stamp today with a DICK on it! It’s causing lots of confusion cuz bitches don’t know what side to lick!

Whostheboss · 09-08-2008, 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DasBoost

The Post Office released a new stamp today with a DICK on it! It’s causing lots of confusion cuz bitches don’t know what side to lick!

BOOST3D · 09-08-2008, 04:30 PM

a couple are kissing each other at the park with an old man watching....
the girl says ohh my arm hurts and the guy kisses the girls arm and she is like oh much better but now my neck hurts so they guy kisses the girls neck she is like much better, then the old man asks the guy can you heal hemorrhoids?

SoYank · 09-08-2008, 07:16 PM

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, and neither could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light."

After a few more minutes they came to another intersection, the light was red, and again they went right through. This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it. She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know that you ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us!

Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh No! Am I driving?"

Whostheboss · 09-10-2008, 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SoYank

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, and neither could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light."

After a few more minutes they came to another intersection, the light was red, and again they went right through. This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it. She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know that you ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us!

Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh No! Am I driving?"

jinkazama0619 · 09-10-2008, 03:12 PM

na fa fo na fa fo fo

MadDog · 09-12-2008, 11:32 PM

A man was laying in bed with his new girlfriend.

After having great sex, she spent the next hour just
stroking his penis, something she seemed to love to do.

Enjoying it, he turned and asked her, 'Why do you love
doing that?'

She replied, 'Because I really miss mine.'

DimSumBoy · 09-13-2008, 12:34 PM

why do black people wear white gloves?

so they dont bite their fingers off when they eat tootsie rolls.

HAha sorry, bad one.

TK-421 · 09-14-2008, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by iatacs19

A white guy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand.

He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.

Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted three wishes.

The guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear.

The next thing the guy knows, he's in a bedroom, in a golf-course mansion, surrounded by 50 beautiful women.

After he makes love to all of them, he begins to explore this fabulous house.

Suddenly he feels something soft under his feet, He looks down and the floor is covered in $100 bills.

Then, there's a knock at the door.

He answers it and standing there are two persons dressed in Ku Klux Klan outfits.

They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a limb and hang him by the neck until he's dead.

As the Klansmen are walking away, they remove their hoods.

It's the two blonde genies.

One blonde genie says to the other one, 'I can understand the first wish having all these beautiful women in a big mansion to make love to.

I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire.

But why he wanted to be hung like a black man is beyond me.

I feel retarded... I don't get it.

Whostheboss · 09-16-2008, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MadDog

A man was laying in bed with his new girlfriend.

After having great sex, she spent the next hour just
stroking his penis, something she seemed to love to do.

Enjoying it, he turned and asked her, 'Why do you love
doing that?'

She replied, 'Because I really miss mine.'

Hawkeye · 09-16-2008, 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DimSumBoy

why do black people where white gloves?

so they dont bite their fingers off when they eat tootsie rolls.

HAha sorry, bad one.

It would have been stupid even if you knew how to spell.

Quote:

Originally Posted by news 4 u

I feel retarded... I don't get it.

Hung like a black man... He asked for a big dong and they lynched him

Tondtar · 09-17-2008, 02:18 AM

Two dwarfs decide to treat themselves to a vacation in Las Vegas. At the hotel bar, they're dazzled by two women, and wind up taking them to their separate rooms.

The first dwarf is disappointed, however, as he's unable to get a boner. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears cries of ONE, TWO, THREE...HUH! all night long.

In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?".

The first whispers back, "It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn't get an erection".

The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing? I couldn't even get on the bed!"

Whostheboss · 09-17-2008, 08:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tondtar

Two dwarfs decide to treat themselves to a vacation in Las Vegas. At the hotel bar, they're dazzled by two women, and wind up taking them to their separate rooms.

The first dwarf is disappointed, however, as he's unable to get a boner. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears cries of ONE, TWO, THREE...HUH! all night long.

In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?".

The first whispers back, "It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn't get an erection".

The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing? I couldn't even get on the bed!"

Tondtar · 09-17-2008, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tondtar

Two dwarfs decide to treat themselves to a vacation in Las Vegas. At the hotel bar, they're dazzled by two women, and wind up taking them to their separate rooms.

The first dwarf is disappointed, however, as he's unable to get a boner. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears cries of ONE, TWO, THREE...HUH! all night long.

In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?".

The first whispers back, "It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn't get an erection".

The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing? I couldn't even get on the bed!"

Quote:

Originally Posted by Whostheboss

This thread is hopeless sometimes

09-05-2008, 04:56 PM	#155
DasBoost Tek Dat 2 Rep 21 Posts Drives: E92 335i Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: NYC iTrader: (0)	The Post Office released a new stamp today with a DICK on it! It’s causing lots of confusion cuz bitches don’t know what side to lick!
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09-08-2008, 04:30 PM	#157
BOOST3D Captain 30 Rep 838 Posts Drives: 328i 2000,X5 2003,2008 335i Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: whittier SOCAL iTrader: (10)	a couple are kissing each other at the park with an old man watching.... the girl says ohh my arm hurts and the guy kisses the girls arm and she is like oh much better but now my neck hurts so they guy kisses the girls neck she is like much better, then the old man asks the guy can you heal hemorrhoids?
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09-08-2008, 07:16 PM	#158
SoYank Major General 578 Rep 7,519 Posts Drives: 2009 E90 335i MT Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Vinton, Virginia iTrader: (1) Garage List 2009 BMW E90 335i S ... [9.00]	Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, and neither could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light." After a few more minutes they came to another intersection, the light was red, and again they went right through. This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things. She was getting nervous and decided to pay very close attention. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red and they went right through it. She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know that you ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us! Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh No! Am I driving?" __________________ **2009 E90 335i Montego Blue · Black Leather · Burl Walnut · 6MT · US Spec** SatNav • ZPP • ZCW • 6FL • TPMS • iDrive • PDC • HWS • Xenons • BMW Assist • Power Rear Sunshade • Logic 7 European Taillights • Rear Foglamp • OEM Alarm • PicoTray • DataToys XM-DVR • Multi-view Processor Quaife ATB LSD • Short Shift Knob • Hartge Anti-Roll Bars • AP Racing Front Brakes • 19" Style 269
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09-10-2008, 03:12 PM	#160
jinkazama0619 Ninja 19 Rep 292 Posts Drives: E92 Silver Surfer Join Date: May 2007 Location: MD iTrader: (1)	na fa fo na fa fo fo
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09-12-2008, 11:32 PM	#161
MadDog Careful, I Bite..... 157 Rep 504 Posts Drives: 2006 325i Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: S.F. Bay Area iTrader: (0) Garage List 2006 325i [7.50]	A man was laying in bed with his new girlfriend. After having great sex, she spent the next hour just stroking his penis, something she seemed to love to do. Enjoying it, he turned and asked her, 'Why do you love doing that?' She replied, 'Because I really miss mine.' Last edited by MadDog; 09-13-2008 at 12:19 AM..
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09-13-2008, 12:34 PM	#162
DimSumBoy Private First Class 3 Rep 167 Posts Drives: 08 e92 335i Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: sf bay iTrader: (0) Garage List 08 335i [0.00]	why do black people wear white gloves? so they dont bite their fingers off when they eat tootsie rolls. HAha sorry, bad one. __________________ Last edited by DimSumBoy; 09-16-2008 at 09:25 PM..
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09-17-2008, 02:18 AM	#166
Tondtar 12 yr old Juvie 1127 Rep 881 Posts Drives: His Mom Crazy Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: El Lay iTrader: (2) Garage List 2008 (RIP in 2011) ... [0.00]	Two dwarfs decide to treat themselves to a vacation in Las Vegas. At the hotel bar, they're dazzled by two women, and wind up taking them to their separate rooms. The first dwarf is disappointed, however, as he's unable to get a boner. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears cries of ONE, TWO, THREE...HUH! all night long. In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?". The first whispers back, "It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn't get an erection". The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing? I couldn't even get on the bed!"
	Appreciate 0 Quote