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      04-24-2023, 08:01 AM   #1233
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Funny but many are not steven wright
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      04-24-2023, 10:33 AM   #1234
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Wow.
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      04-24-2023, 10:38 AM   #1235
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Murf the Surf View Post
Wow.
Could also be attributed to an ex-wife.
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      04-24-2023, 10:45 AM   #1236
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Could also be attributed to an ex-wife.
Either of them.
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      04-24-2023, 12:14 PM   #1237
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      04-24-2023, 06:42 PM   #1238
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      04-24-2023, 07:00 PM   #1239
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^ "To the moon," Robert.
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      04-24-2023, 08:52 PM   #1240
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Love this guy ... a few more ...

https://www.wanderings.net/notebook/...OfStevenWright

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3798j View Post
The musings of Steven Wright:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ..... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever ... So far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popu, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work
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      04-25-2023, 12:03 AM   #1241
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      04-25-2023, 01:39 PM   #1242
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      04-25-2023, 01:43 PM   #1243
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More!
Thank the lord its not just me that goes off into a daydream..........
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      04-25-2023, 02:20 PM   #1244
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      04-26-2023, 11:40 AM   #1245
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My wife wears Crocs. No, these aren’t her feet.
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      04-26-2023, 05:10 PM   #1246
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A matter of perspective.



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      04-26-2023, 05:57 PM   #1247
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back when beer commercials had a simple message...
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      04-26-2023, 06:15 PM   #1248
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This almost did damage when I saw it.
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      04-26-2023, 06:31 PM   #1249
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?
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      04-26-2023, 06:41 PM   #1250
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Murf the Surf View Post
?
Lol, my current CDR is a Combat Engineer, so I bust his chops about stuff like this all the time, especially when something is damaged unnecessarily.
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      04-26-2023, 06:49 PM   #1251
Murf the Surf
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Quote:
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Lol, my current CDR is a Combat Engineer, so I bust his chops about stuff like this all the time, especially when something is damaged unnecessarily.
Sometimes you just need to take the ignorant approach if you know what I mean.
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      04-26-2023, 06:57 PM   #1252
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Murf the Surf View Post
Sometimes you just need to take the ignorant approach if you know what I mean.
Absolutely!!
I'm an infantry guy in trade, so naturally I get it back whenever something relatively complicated needs to be accomplished, but is completed in a half-assed, direct approach, lol
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      04-26-2023, 07:09 PM   #1253
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Quote:
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?
Never met one, but I understand it.

The shortest distance from point A to point B is a straight line.

Last edited by Esteban; 04-26-2023 at 08:24 PM..
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      04-26-2023, 09:06 PM   #1254
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Murf the Surf View Post
This almost did damage when I saw it.
Rum talking?
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