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      10-30-2014, 04:51 PM   #1101
Billup
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I'm 4 Miller Fortunes in. I left work early because some dipshit cut an optic line near the plant, so I couldn't get on my system all day.

So now I'm at home drinking with the old man talking to an 18 year old on Tinder.
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      10-30-2014, 06:03 PM   #1102
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Alright - whose starting already??
Where you at bitch?
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      10-30-2014, 06:21 PM   #1103
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Anxiously awaiting tomorrow, so that I can have a drink. :|
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      10-30-2014, 09:02 PM   #1104
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Where you at bitch?
Yo I'm here sorry I was chatting with hot babes. But now my hour is up.
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You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.
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      10-30-2014, 09:12 PM   #1105
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Yo I'm here sorry I was chatting with hot babes. But now my hour is up.
I'm trying to woo an 18 year old right now. It's going so so. I will be out of town next week so it puts a damper on my game. Pissed off.
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      10-30-2014, 09:15 PM   #1106
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I'm trying to woo an 18 year old right now. It's going so so. I will be out of town next week so it puts a damper on my game. Pissed off.
I am organizing phone numbers in numerical order. Should I start with the '1' numbers or the '9' ones?

I'm thinking '1' because if they put that they're probably on vacation and I'll just get the one shot (no pun intended)
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You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.
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      10-30-2014, 09:18 PM   #1107
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Dude, you are way above my level on that one.


I barely know how to use my phone other than to text and call.
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      10-30-2014, 09:22 PM   #1108
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Dude, you are way above my level on that one.


I barely know how to use my phone other than to text and call.
and pron. don't forget the pron... and baby giraffes.
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You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.
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      10-30-2014, 09:24 PM   #1109
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Billup wooing an 18 year old:

"I am your elder. Now, bring me bacon and sit on my face."

Because Tinder. And bacon.
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      10-30-2014, 09:27 PM   #1110
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You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.
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      10-30-2014, 10:47 PM   #1111
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Billup wooing an 18 year old:

"I am your elder. Now, bring me bacon and sit on my face."

Because Tinder. And bacon.
I am walking diligently around this one.


Anytime I show my true colors, people get offended. So I need to be all fucking mysterious and shit. Ruining my fucking vibe. But that's what it takes to get a lil summin summin.
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      10-30-2014, 10:55 PM   #1112
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I am walking diligently around this one.


Anytime I show my true colors, people get offended. So I need to be all fucking mysterious and shit. Ruining my fucking vibe. But that's what it takes to get a lil summin summin.
So, more like, "I am your elder. Maybe. Now, bring me some bacon. Then, I will reveal where you may sit. It may or may not be on my face."

That is a bit more mysterious, I think.
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      10-30-2014, 11:02 PM   #1113
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So, more like, "I am your elder. Maybe. Now, bring me some bacon. Then, I will reveal where you may sit. It may or may not be on my face."

That is a bit more mysterious, I think.
As much I personally enjoy where your head is at, to get a womans head where I would enjoy it, requires a little more accuracy in the word department.


I will however take that information for future reference if I ever feel like I need to lure you into my pants.
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      10-30-2014, 11:08 PM   #1114
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to get a womans head where I would enjoy it, requires a little more accuracy in the word department.
As in, "cast your heavenly shadow over my heathen visage?"
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      10-31-2014, 04:19 AM   #1115
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^
googling visage
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      10-31-2014, 10:06 PM   #1116
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I'm a couple of brewskis and four shots in. Anybody else drinking this Halloween night? Shaun of the Dead is on!
Well?!
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      10-31-2014, 11:46 PM   #1117
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Ok so I just wanted to dishwasher and disowned kamel Diana
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You know you're getting bacon, when you're cooking bacon.
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      10-31-2014, 11:50 PM   #1118
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Well?!
On my porch enjoying a cigar and a glass of Glenlivet...
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      11-01-2014, 06:55 AM   #1119
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Ok so I just wanted to dishwasher and disowned kamel Diana
Lolwut
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      11-03-2014, 03:55 PM   #1120
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I put a deposit down on a giraffe. Pick it up next week.
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      11-03-2014, 03:58 PM   #1121
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I put a deposit down on a giraffe. Pick it up next week.
It hasn't been 2 weeks yet!
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      11-03-2014, 04:01 PM   #1122
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It hasn't been 2 weeks yet!
Mods won't ban me. Very disappointing.
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