BMW E60 5-Series Forum | 5Post.com  
BMW Garage BMW Meets Register Today's Posts  

Go Back   BMW E60 5-Series Forum | 5Post.com > BIMMERPOST Universal Forums > Off-Topic Discussions Board

Post Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
      10-05-2014, 10:38 PM   #67
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11830
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

My husbands sister is going to spend three months with us next summer. Lups will not be home for three months next summer. She said she wants to take my car to a road trip, "One like you did Anna"

This will never happen. I will die before she even rides in it, driving is not an option.

A kid had bullied my son in the park today, their tutor had tried to stop him, and had talked with the mother, who had not given a shit and was nasty to the tutor. If I ever see that bitch (tutor points her out to me) I will get her in ways only my smooth and calm way of having a conversation with a person who lets their kids do anything deserves.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      10-05-2014, 10:45 PM   #68
squishy
Banned
Zimbabwe
155
Rep
388
Posts

Drives: 2014 Ford Mustang GT
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Running away from an ocean vagina

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
My husbands sister is going to spend three months with us next summer. Lups will not be home for three months next summer. She said she wants to take my car to a road trip, "One like you did Anna"

This will never happen. I will die before she even rides in it, driving is not an option.

A kid had bullied my son in the park today, their tutor had tried to stop him, and had talked with the mother, who had not given a shit and was nasty to the tutor. If I ever see that bitch (tutor points her out to me) I will get her in ways only my smooth and calm way of having a conversation with a person who lets their kids do anything deserves.
*our son
Appreciate 0
      10-05-2014, 10:47 PM   #69
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11830
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by squishy View Post
*our son
LOL it would be an epic fail for me to find the hubby from here, since he doesn't even drive, and I tell you guys way too much
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 07:58 AM   #70
Billup
Banned
Burkina Faso
476
Rep
928
Posts

Drives: Your mum crazy.
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Baconopolos Island

iTrader: (0)

I went out to the bars this weekend. I farted a couple times not so pleasantly, but I turned around and gave the guy behind me a funny look as if it were him.
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 08:43 AM   #71
Nkc
NOOB
Nkc's Avatar
Canada
1607
Rep
1,356
Posts

Drives: Cars
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: @BMWclassicdivision

iTrader: (0)

I always have to lift 1 leg a bit to fart
__________________
@BMWclassicdivision
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 02:20 PM   #72
Uber V8
Volcano Knuckles
Uber V8's Avatar
United_States
414
Rep
491
Posts

Drives: 2017 Camaro SS 1LE
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Los Angeles

iTrader: (1)

I wear women's deodorant and I love it. But my confession is, I'm a man.
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 02:30 PM   #73
2011CrazE89
Moved on
2011CrazE89's Avatar
United_States
130
Rep
166
Posts

Drives: 2011 Z430i & 2015 MB C300
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: South Florida

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by FwdFtl View Post
I wear women's deodorant and I love it. But my confession is, I'm a man.
Sometimes when I run out I use my wife's Ban powder fresh. I've found myself using it more often.
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 03:01 PM   #74
Uber V8
Volcano Knuckles
Uber V8's Avatar
United_States
414
Rep
491
Posts

Drives: 2017 Camaro SS 1LE
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Los Angeles

iTrader: (1)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2011CrazE89 View Post
Sometimes when I run out I use my wife's Ban powder fresh. I've found myself using it more often.
That's exactly how I discovered it. Except she had Secret. It seems like women's deodorant last way longer than men's deodorant.
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 04:37 PM   #75
Whostheboss
Captain
Whostheboss's Avatar
410
Rep
841
Posts

Drives: a 9incher
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: No. Virginia U.S.A.

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by NEFARIOUS View Post
My friend's wife got a new phone and wanted me to help her set it up. I found emails with nudes sent to random guys and told him. We're still friends (although we have to hang out away from his wife) and he's so grateful that I exposed her that he even has me in his will, but I still feel bad for the impending divorce and the fate of their 6 year old daughter.
__________________
WHO'S THE BOSS
Appreciate 1
M3 boi3220.00
      10-06-2014, 06:41 PM   #76
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11830
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2011CrazE89 View Post
Sometimes when I run out I use my wife's Ban powder fresh. I've found myself using it more often.
Quote:
Originally Posted by FwdFtl View Post
That's exactly how I discovered it. Except she had Secret. It seems like women's deodorant last way longer than men's deodorant.
Good for you guys, nothing smells worse than men bathing in your deodorant. Use ours, scent yourselves with something else. Thank you both.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 08:07 PM   #77
MrPrena
Captain
MrPrena's Avatar
United_States
1590
Rep
803
Posts

Drives: BMW Hyundai Nissan
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: TB

iTrader: (0)

No cheating on your girlfriend/boyfriend in the past confessions? hahaha
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 10:45 PM   #78
808@702
8th BMW, 520th Surfboard
808@702's Avatar
511
Rep
1,215
Posts

Drives: My girlfriends crazy!
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Las Vegas, Nv. and Honolulu, Hi. and Seattle Wa.

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Buahaha

Dude you know you're old when that's legal.
Yeah it was legal, barely. She was too young, what was I thinking?
Appreciate 0
      10-06-2014, 11:34 PM   #79
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11830
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by 808@702 View Post
Yeah it was legal, barely. She was too young, what was I thinking?
Every girl at some point goes for the older, I did this too, and I really hope my kiddos will be the first one ever even to date.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      10-07-2014, 10:33 AM   #80
squishy
Banned
Zimbabwe
155
Rep
388
Posts

Drives: 2014 Ford Mustang GT
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Running away from an ocean vagina

iTrader: (0)

Not gonna lie, I straight up buy women's deodrant
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:40 PM   #81
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11830
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

One of my neighbors. One of these days his disgusting attempts to flirt will get him close enough that I'll smash his rotten teeth in. I hate when people evoke that kind of reactions in me, and I feel sorry for his wife who just stands there looking miserable. I just want to make sure he never talks to me again, I dont care if our kids could be friends, never letting mine into his house.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:45 PM   #82
Billup
Banned
Burkina Faso
476
Rep
928
Posts

Drives: Your mum crazy.
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Baconopolos Island

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
One of my neighbors. One of these days his disgusting attempts to flirt will get him close enough that I'll smash his rotten teeth in. I hate when people evoke that kind of reactions in me, and I feel sorry for his wife who just stands there looking miserable. I just want to make sure he never talks to me again, I dont care if our kids could be friends, never letting mine into his house.

You should pull all four valve stems from his tires in the middle of the night.
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:45 PM   #83
m3ray
Banned
No_Country
104
Rep
701
Posts

Drives: '09 e92 M3
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: New York City

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
One of my neighbors. One of these days his disgusting attempts to flirt will get him close enough that I'll smash his rotten teeth in. I hate when people evoke that kind of reactions in me, and I feel sorry for his wife who just stands there looking miserable. I just want to make sure he never talks to me again, I dont care if our kids could be friends, never letting mine into his house.
Okay then.
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:47 PM   #84
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11830
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
You should pull all four valve stems from his tires in the middle of the night.

Haha, I couldn't hurt a car, that would be cruel.

Quote:
Originally Posted by m3ray View Post
Okay then.
Was that a permission to go ape?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:49 PM   #85
Billup
Banned
Burkina Faso
476
Rep
928
Posts

Drives: Your mum crazy.
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Baconopolos Island

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Haha, I couldn't hurt a car, that would be cruel.
That's the beauty of it. Nothing gets hurt. He'll just need new stems, some air, and a brain.
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:52 PM   #86
m3ray
Banned
No_Country
104
Rep
701
Posts

Drives: '09 e92 M3
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: New York City

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Was that a permission to go ape?
Umm, I was thinking more along the lines of pyschotherapy, but by all means, do whatever you need to do to satisfy those urges.
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:52 PM   #87
Uber V8
Volcano Knuckles
Uber V8's Avatar
United_States
414
Rep
491
Posts

Drives: 2017 Camaro SS 1LE
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Los Angeles

iTrader: (1)

Quote:
Originally Posted by squishy View Post
Not gonna lie, I straight up buy women's deodrant
I'm off to Target.
Appreciate 0
      10-09-2014, 02:52 PM   #88
Lups
...
Lups's Avatar
11830
Rep
15,400
Posts

Drives: I don't own a car.
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Lost as usual

iTrader: (0)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Billup View Post
That's the beauty of it. Nothing gets hurt. He'll just need new stems, some air, and a brain.
If he's stupid enough still to try talk to me, he's stupid enough never to spot the problem. He would just take the wife's car and she would let him.

That man gives me the creeps every time
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta0311 View Post
How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
Appreciate 0
Post Reply

Bookmarks


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:25 AM.




5post
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.
1Addicts.com, BIMMERPOST.com, E90Post.com, F30Post.com, M3Post.com, ZPost.com, 5Post.com, 6Post.com, 7Post.com, XBimmers.com logo and trademark are properties of BIMMERPOST