Dating - Good/Bad Experiences

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Lups

This is finland, and the electricity bill includes heating, and lighting, all appliances and 4 days a week sauna addiction in an oversized house. Greta would be proud of me, especially when she heard I only buy electricity produced by wind.




Clearly I've been communicating on a higher level without knowing it. I'm now proud of myself yet sad. The pornhub free thingy they did for italy during their peak never reached our shores (I wouldve given that to the fucker bestie as a christmas present).

Lups come brush and braid my golden locks please. I'll bring Judy out of retirement for you.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by King Rudi

Lups come brush and braid my golden locks please. I'll bring Judy out of retirement for you.

For my girl Judy, always!

Be quick tho, I have a hairbrush in my sight and those are fast to disappear in my house.

[pennsiveguy]

My previous girlfriend had been ridiculed quite a bit as a child. Her parents were assholes and instigated a lot of rivalry and mutual envy between the siblings over silly superficial stuff. She ended up, not surprisingly, with some pretty significant insecurities. When they weren't flaring up, I could do pretty much as I pleased with my time, subject to the usual common courtesy and consideration; if I said I was probably going to be home around 5 and it was 5:30, she was glad to see me.

But when her insecurities were triggered, everything changed. Her coping mechanisms for feeling insecure were controlling behavior and nitpicking. If I said I was going to be home at 5 and didn't make it home until 5:15, there was going to be some discussion. If I got home at 2 o'clock on a Saturday afternoon and wanted to catch a quick nap before dinner - even though we didn't have any plans - that wasn't cool either. One time when I was making pork chops for us - in my kitchen, mind you - she insisted on showing me how to arrange the chops in the pan. As if there was some magical trick to that which I couldn't figure out on my own. Totally insulting. I don't give a fuck if you're Jacques Pepin, you don't step into someone else's kitchen and start nitpicking them or bossing them around. I told her to go lay by her dish and lick her butt, which didn't go over too well. I have zero tolerance for being the target of someone's control fetishes or insecurities or impulsive behavior.

The inconsistency and unpredictability was crazy-making and exhausting. It got to where I didn't know which version of her I'd be experiencing. In the end, it was too much. I'd rather come home to an empty but peaceful home than to be putting the key in the lock and wondering if I was going to catch hell for something minor before I'd even taken my shoes off.

Originally Posted by King Rudi

I agree and disagree with this. I think it depends on the persons in said relationship. I've seen this work and go horribly awry. I believe it goes back to communication in order for this to work. Crossed wires, time and space can wreak havoc for some. thank you for the words sir. I think we are on the mend.



My only thought on the first comments of "Baby, I'm different" everyone says that.....everyone. I'm about as polar opposite of most people that you can imagine. By this rational, I don't draw attention to what makes me different. Those that know me see it without self proclamation. I appreciate your kind words. I know how we feel about each other and we all run into rough patches. Aside from some shitty things being said on both sides, out of frustration, nothing major has happened to deem this unresolvable. We'll continue to do what we do, make some slight adjustments out of consideration for the other and see how things work from there.



I tend to live my life by the mentality that if I don't want people throwing stones, not to give them the stones; in the same mindset, I give so many stones that it's pointless throwing them. I call myself out on my own mistakes and I'm very transparent. Most people don't know how to take me. I'd rather be honest about something and upfront, so that people can't talk shit. I own it. This is also a dangerous personality to have if your heart or mind isn't right.

As for the acceptance of and primary blame of "the shit", this is the battle that we have been fighting. She was displaying no signs of empathy. She was upset about how she feels, but couldn't see mine. This was a struggle. I feel like I finally succeeded here as she gave me a genuine, heart-felt apology last night. Progression was made. Thank you for the advice!



Thank you. This is exactly how I feel about the entire situation. I actually mentioned this to a close friend, a few days ago. Oddly enough, she has some insecurities that she wrestles with. I say "oddly enough" because most would look at her and try to figure out how she could be insecure. She is gorgeous and has a body that I only see online or in magazines. She is a great person all around, but those insecurities, and trying to keep them hidden, is what is keeping her withdrawn to a degree. These are the things that I feel like either make or break a relationship. A person could give me no reason not to trust them, but still have some shady vibes being projected, simply over not wanting to be embarrassed. Embarrassment and humility are very important in all relationships. We've been together for 4 1/2 years and I still haven't heard her fart. I respect this and question it at the same time, if that makes sense.

I think that working on, whatever she has suppressed, together will create more trust between the two of us and allow her to become more open/vulnerable. If this doesn't change, regardless of anything else that are positives in our relationship, I'll have to walk away. I'm a catch, not a convenience. I'm also not conceited, I just know my value/worth.

Thank you Rebekah.



This shit is about to get interesting.....and fast. Lups drop some pearls of wisdom for me. I feel like Lups should be a life coach.



I always say that I'm an asshole, but only because I'm a typical type A. I speak fast, I walk fast, I'm direct and to the point. This instantly makes people think you are an asshole. In reality, I spend more time considering other people and basically trying to get my shit done without being in their way. I'm this way because this is how I wish other people were toward me.

Thank you good sir.



She admitted to how stupid the entire situation was. What made her upset, aside from whatever insecurity that she has suppressed (if we're being real here), was my reaction to her not being forthcoming with information that could be detrimental to our relationship. That was, in fact, something to her. In her defense, she isn't wrong. I'm a scorpio and we aren't known for being easy people to deal with, once we feel like we've been slighted. She is justified in her feelings based off how I reacted, yet; my reaction was completely justified based off her withholding of information......or so I feel.


In closing, thank you to all for replying. I greatly appreciate it. As of last night, make up sex has ensued.....and not that vanilla shit either. We have reached an acceptable outlet to vent frustrations that is mutually agreed upon by both parties.

[Tommy-G]

Originally Posted by pennsiveguy

I told her to go lay by her dish and lick her butt, which didn't go over too well.

This may be the single greatest laugh I have had in 2020...Thank you!

[Turkish Pickle]

Damn, the few days I was away lots went down it seems

King Rudi dude in all honesty I thought you two broke up a while back and that was that... I don't know why I thought that.

I'll throw in some niceties into the thread; Monday was 4 months with her, the house purchase going well, finished school once and for all (I hope, at least, still need to see the final grades), job ready, and I have an indefinite amount of time of vacation in the mean time because I need to get my paperwork. I came to the city a bit early today, booked a hotel for us since she lands at 10p and I didn't want to drive 2-2.5hrs that late. Currently hanging out in the room by myself planning for the night

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by TommyG-inFlaNow

This may be the single greatest laugh I have had in 2020...Thank you!

Thanks! It's not been a very funny year, but I'll take the compliment nonetheless.

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

Damn, the few days I was away lots went down it seems

King Rudi dude in all honesty I thought you two broke up a while back and that was that... I don't know why I thought that.

I'll throw in some niceties into the thread; Monday was 4 months with her, the house purchase going well, finished school once and for all (I hope, at least, still need to see the final grades), job ready, and I have an indefinite amount of time of vacation in the mean time because I need to get my paperwork. I came to the city a bit early today, booked a hotel for us since she lands at 10p and I didn't want to drive 2-2.5hrs that late. Currently hanging out in the room by myself planning for the night

Congrats on all the above, Turkish Pickle . Well deserved.

[vreihen16]

Originally Posted by Lups

The pornhub free thingy they did for italy during their peak never reached our shores (I wouldve given that to the fucker bestie as a christmas present).

I thought that I read a news article a few weeks ago that they were now 100% free for everyone, since Visa and MasterCard cut off their merchant accounts needed to process payments?????

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

Damn, the few days I was away lots went down it seems

King Rudi dude in all honesty I thought you two broke up a while back and that was that... I don't know why I thought that.

I'll throw in some niceties into the thread; Monday was 4 months with her, the house purchase going well, finished school once and for all (I hope, at least, still need to see the final grades), job ready, and I have an indefinite amount of time of vacation in the mean time because I need to get my paperwork. I came to the city a bit early today, booked a hotel for us since she lands at 10p and I didn't want to drive 2-2.5hrs that late. Currently hanging out in the room by myself planning for the night

Yes....we did break up in September under similar circumstances, but only lasted a couple of weeks. That's what's frustrating about this one. I'm trying to prevent a trend here....and at the same time feel like I'm condoning one. I've decided if this shit happens again there will be no argument or even a discussion; it will be the last time we speak.

Dude! This is awesome! Well done Pickle! Proud of and for you sir!

[Lups]

Originally Posted by vreihen16

I thought that I read a news article a few weeks ago that they were now 100% free for everyone, since Visa and MasterCard cut off their merchant accounts needed to process payments?????

Totally giving that then for everyone for christmas.

Better yet, I'll give it to their wives.

[vreihen16]

https://www.axios.com/pornhub-master...5624b60ea.html

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Lups

For my girl Judy, always!

Be quick tho, I have a hairbrush in my sight and those are fast to disappear in my house.

Lups, we are DONE

[Lups]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

Lups, we are DONE

Omg, you were not supposed to find out this way!

[Tambohamilton]

Originally Posted by vreihen16

https://www.axios.com/pornhub-master...5624b60ea.html

The back story to this is grim

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Lups

Omg, you were not supposed to find out this way!

See, folks: COMMUNICATION (or lack thereof)

[Lups]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

See, folks: COMMUNICATION (or lack thereof)

Hey our issue is that rudi is easier than you!

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Lups

Hey our issue is that rudi is easier than you!

Rudi, Tutti, Judy, King Rudi can't grow you no jalapenos though, can he???

wait, whut???

[Lups]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

Rudi, Tutti, Judy, King Rudi can't grow you no jalapenos though, can he???

wait, whut???

I'm expecting a call from the cops here since I'm ordering a weed growing set so I can grow habaneros in finland. Turns out those need more light and more humidity than I can offer, and the pit heads sell sets way cheaper than the spice freaks are marketed.

[Rich150001]

So I don't normally post things like this, but due to its relevance to the M car I thought i'd share. I had just sold my C7 Corvette prior to a break up with my cohabitation ex gf. After a few months of being broke up I decided to buy an M4. She had to nerve to say she would get back with me ONLY if I sold the M4, not bc we needed the money for something, but bc she thought I took advantage of the situation (note: she broke up with me). Needless to say I chose the M4 =D

[FuzzyPeaches]

Originally Posted by Rich150001

So I don't normally post things like this, but due to its relevance to the M car I thought i'd share. I had just sold my C7 Corvette prior to a break up with my cohabitation ex gf. After a few months of being broke up I decided to buy an M4. She had to nerve to say she would get back with me ONLY if I sold the M4, not bc we needed the money for something, but bc she thought I took advantage of the situation (note: she broke up with me). Needless to say I chose the M4 =D

Sounds like a solid choice.

[Tambohamilton]

Originally Posted by Rich150001

So I don't normally post things like this, but due to its relevance to the M car I thought i'd share. I had just sold my C7 Corvette prior to a break up with my cohabitation ex gf. After a few months of being broke up I decided to buy an M4. She had to nerve to say she would get back with me ONLY if I sold the M4, not bc we needed the money for something, but bc she thought I took advantage of the situation (note: she broke up with me). Needless to say I chose the M4 =D

Yeah, nah, you made the right choice! Sounds like she just wanted to control or manipulate you.

[premier3is]

Been a while since I posted here, but here's my shit story for the day lol. I met someone on a dating app like 5 months ago. We hit it off immediately, texted daily and had so many similarities it was crazy, literally a perfect match on both ends...

Due to COVID we tried to hold off on meeting to be safe, but this shit ain't fuckin ending ever so I said let's just meet since it's been 5 months now and I know she was anxious to meet too. We met last week, everything went well (walk at the beach) and we were gona meet again but the texting after we met seemed dry as fuck from her end. I felt like she didnt know if she wanted to continue talking to me any further and ofcourse today she texted me that she didn't feel a connection. Why even continue to text me for a week after if you had decided already....?

And that's it... 5 months down the drain. Learned my fuckin lesson to never go that long without meeting someone again. What a complete waste of time. Time to take a break from apps again.