Dating - Good/Bad Experiences

[FuriouslyFast]

Originally Posted by pennsiveguy

It's important to me to spend some time around someone to watch how they react to different situations, to see how they handle themselves. And to hear what they have to say about it afterwards. People can make claims and declarations about themselves, but how they act and how they treat people - including me - is what's real. I pay special attention to how someone treats people of lower perceived status than them, and people who they have nothing to gain from. My date the other day was really warm and friendly with the young man of color behind the counter at the deli we had lunch at. I was impressed. That speaks to their character. When someone claims to be kind and generous, and then treats the wait staff at a restaurant like shit, doesn't make eye contact with the server...yeah, we're done here.

Sounds like you got some good information there. Nice catch!

What does the color of his skin have to do with it?

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

What does the color of his skin have to do with it?

If she were a racist, a lot.

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

What does the color of his skin have to do with it?

You'd be surprised, there are still people who will treat others like garbage based on that.

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

You'd be surprised, there are still people who will treat others like garbage based on that.

You're correct, unfortunately. It would have been a deal-breaker for me if I had sensed that. Or at the very least something I would have needed some answers or clarification on.

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

Surprised at car talk? I guess she is the hermit

I think going as far as thinking someone is a hermit etc just b/c you don't get recognized when out on a date does not mean you're a shut in or lack social skills.

Nobody's suggested that if you don't get recognized and approached, that you are a hermit. I said that if you are recognized, it gives some reassurance that you're not a hermit. You understand that the two are not the same, right?

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by pennsiveguy

You're correct, unfortunately. It would have been a deal-breaker for me if I had sensed that. Or at the very least something I would have needed some answers or clarification on.

There are a lot of self absorbed people out there. It doesn't even have to be anything race specific, but I've met a lot of people who didn't give a shit about anyone else. From treating waiters like servants to just walking around like they own the place making other people move out of the way.

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

Good job. How many shit profiles/messages did you have to go through on Zoosk, though? I'm still not sure I wanna pay for that site.

There's a lot of chaff and not much wheat, same as every other site and the population in general. I don't keep a log of how many messages I send, how many responses I get. I think it'd bum me out, and that's probably why I don't. So I don't have any hard stats for you.

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

There are a lot of self absorbed people out there. It doesn't even have to be anything race specific, but I've met a lot of people who didn't give a shit about anyone else. From treating waiters like servants to just walking around like they own the place making other people move out of the way.

Yeah, an entitled attitude would be a big turn-off for me. Or self-centered or narcissistic personality traits. These people don't form partnerships; they just suck as much energy out of everyone they can.

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by pennsiveguy

It's important to me to spend some time around someone to watch how they react to different situations, to see how they handle themselves. And to hear what they have to say about it afterwards. People can make claims and declarations about themselves, but how they act and how they treat people - including me - is what's real. I pay special attention to how someone treats people of lower perceived status than them, and people who they have nothing to gain from. My date the other day was really warm and friendly with the young man of color behind the counter at the deli we had lunch at. I was impressed. That speaks to their character. When someone claims to be kind and generous, and then treats the wait staff at a restaurant like shit, doesn't make eye contact with the server...yeah, we're done here.

Sounds like you got some good information there. Nice catch!

Thanks, my friend. She appears to be a good catch, thus far.

My mom waited tables when she was a young lady and my daughter did, as well. Like you, I always pay particularly close attention to these interactions. If someone treats the staff like crap, it's at least a talk and can go as high as a walk out for me. Non-negotiable.

I'm glad you're having success on your end! Great job!!

[FuriouslyFast]

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

You'd be surprised, there are still people who will treat others like garbage based on that.

No, I wouldn't be. I'm well aware. Skin should have been left out of this particular story IMO. Maybe you just didn't post some back story?

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

No, I wouldn't be. I'm well aware. Skin should have been left out of this particular story IMO. Maybe you just didn't post some back story?

I included it in the story because I thought it relevant. And it is, after all, my story.

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

No, I wouldn't be. I'm well aware. Skin should have been left out of this particular story IMO. Maybe you just didn't post some back story?

Not necessarily. You don't know what experiences he's had in the past. I know it's your opinion but perhaps it is still relevant to him.

[pennsiveguy]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

Not necessarily. You don't know what experiences he's had in the past. I know it's your opinion but perhaps it is still relevant to him.

I've been witness to white people treating POC differently. Not badly, but differently. It made me aware that skin color was something significant to them and which governed how they interacted with people. That's disappointing. Not someone I could develop a lot of respect for.

[Rmtt]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

I'm sorry to hear this. I've worked with this organization professionally and they have good tools. Have you tried to get her into any clinical trials?

https://migraineresearchfoundation.org

Will definitely look into it. Only problem is what I mentioned early about the reaction. For some reason, her immune system is really crazy now.

[FuriouslyFast]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

Not necessarily. You don't know what experiences he's had in the past. I know it's your opinion but perhaps it is still relevant to him.

That's why I then said maybe we're missing some backstory

[Rmtt]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

But she is a contributing member of society is the point. That's my whole issue.

I also don't understand how a person can have little to no drive or ambition.

No shots at you with anything I posted.

My only opinion is that most Chronic Migraine Sufferers are always dealing with pain. Some days it's worse than others, but living with it and your tolerance to it plays a big part. So you have a lot of people that push through and do what they have to.

When my wife has a bad one, she can't function at all. Even trying to think is hard. And if someone is legitimately having those 10+ times a month, they can't contribute much.

As bad as it sounds...I wouldn't be able to employee my wife as I wouldn't be able to depend on her in a facility like ours.

But others like the one you posted about who are working a side job "under the table" in my opinion aren't true Chronic sufferers.....and are taking advantage of the condition.

[FuriouslyFast]

Originally Posted by Rmtt

No shots at you with anything I posted.

My only opinion is that most Chronic Migraine Sufferers are always dealing with pain. Some days it's worse than others, but living with it and your tolerance to it plays a big part. So you have a lot of people that push through and do what they have to.

When my wife has a bad one, she can't function at all. Even trying to think is hard. And if someone is legitimately having those 10+ times a month, they can't contribute much.

As bad as it sounds...I wouldn't be able to employee my wife as I wouldn't be able to depend on her in a facility like ours.

But others like the one you posted about who are working a side job "under the table" in my opinion aren't true Chronic sufferers.....and are taking advantage of the condition.

I didn't think you were taking shots at me. I agree that she seems to be abusing the system.

[premier3is]

Originally Posted by pennsiveguy

I had a fun meet-and-greet with a gal I met on Zoosk. She's pretty accomplished (has a PharmD, the PhD of pharmacy) and works for a pharmaceutical company, serving as a consultant to medical professionals. Somewhat funny, very smart, very fit, and I'd call her a strong 7.5. We have plans for dinner next weekend. I'll keep you posted.

Ayeeee very nice!!! Found a good catch I see! Keep us informed about second date. What y'all thinking, just dinner again? 7.5 with a good personality, good job, funny fit and smart..... sounds like a winner brother!

[FuriouslyFast]

Two more gems from last night. Not sure why the POF one decided to be such an ahole.

After I said the last "Amazing" to the Bumble one, I immediately unmatched her.

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

Two more gems from last night. Not sure why the POF one decided to be such an ahole.

After I said the last "Amazing" to the Bumble one, I immediately unmatched her.

The second one.


The first one I think you were a bit harsh. I understand where you are coming from, but you had that one won over from the start with the snarky intro. Shes doing nothing, AKA waiting for you to come over and show her a good time. I also find most people (including myself) have very little "material" to say to someone they've never met, since they have zero knowledge about their personality. Most who know me in person would say I'm funny, but that's because I develop a deeper understanding of what they like and what makes them laugh. The first thing I say to someone I know nothing about is usually just garbage.

There's a lady at one of the buildings I frequent for work who is a receptionist. Our first meeting she probably thought I was quiet, polite, etc. I got to know her a bit, and now I literally make her laugh every time I come in with witty one liners.

[FuriouslyFast]

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

The second one.


The first one I think you were a bit harsh. I understand where you are coming from, but you had that one won over from the start with the snarky intro. Shes doing nothing, AKA waiting for you to come over and show her a good time. I also find most people (including myself) have very little "material" to say to someone they've never met, since they have zero knowledge about their personality. Most who know me in person would say I'm funny, but that's because I develop a deeper understanding of what they like and what makes them laugh. The first thing I say to someone I know nothing about is usually just garbage.

There's a lady at one of the buildings I frequent for work who is a receptionist. Our first meeting she probably thought I was quiet, polite, etc. I got to know her a bit, and now I literally make her laugh every time I come in with witty one liners.

Intro was not snarky. Same one I send to everyone. She talked shit about my age, not my intro. I guess I'm dead b/c I'm 38?

[nyalpine90]

Originally Posted by FuriouslyFast

Intro was not snarky. Same one I send to everyone. She talked shit about my age, not my intro. I guess I'm dead b/c I'm 38?

first one, you replied twice with amazing lol
douchebag status, like u got interesting life

2nd one deserves a donkey punch