Confess here

King Rudi · 05-10-2021, 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joekerr

Dude, if the water level is regularly sitting within an inch of the seat, you really need to repair your toilet - standing isn't the fix here.

What if I....er, HE stands on the seat of said toilet?

TiMSport · 05-10-2021, 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darth One

I can't sit down and pee because of tip dipping issues

Kinda like pissing at a urinal with no hands?

Joekerr · 05-10-2021, 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by King Rudi

What if I....er, HE stands on the seat of said toilet?

I think that would require pushing it down so far to get the correct angle that I fear that you...er HE might get the stretch marks that 2one3E90 has gotten.

EME_Bounce · 05-10-2021, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alfisti

We have 2 boys and so does my sister in law. They teach theirs to pee standing up and I am hardcore against it. Men are being emasculated enough as is, they are born to stand peeing, don't make them beta males.

Could you re-read this and get back to us with an edit?

King Rudi · 05-10-2021, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EME_Bounce

Could you re-read this and get back to us with an edit?

Glad I'm not the only one.

Littlebear · 05-10-2021, 01:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alfisti

We have 2 boys and so does my sister in law. They teach theirs to pee standing up and I am hardcore against it. Men are being emasculated enough as is, they are born to stand peeing, don't make them beta males.

I've heard that in Germany it is kosher for men to sit when peeing at night. Germans are a clean people.

nyalpine90 · 05-10-2021, 01:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alfisti

We have 2 boys and so does my sister in law. They teach theirs to pee standing up and I am hardcore against it. Men are being emasculated enough as is, they are born to stand peeing, don't make them beta males.

Esteban · 05-10-2021, 01:59 PM

Time for some pee jokes:

Where is the best place to go pee? IP Address

I saw a sign today that made me pee myself. It said, "TOILETS CLOSED."

Do you know why women fart after they pee? They can't shake it so they need to blow dry.

Yes, I looked them up. lol

And yes, they're dumb, I know.

Joekerr · 05-10-2021, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Littlebear

I've heard that in Germany it is kosher for men to sit when peeing at night. Germans are a clean people.

I definitely sit in the wee hours of the morning while taking a piss. At that point, I'm not interested in keeping my eyes open for any longer than is absolutely necessary to successfully navigate my way to the toilet without stubbing a toe.

Sedan_Clan · 05-10-2021, 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by King Rudi

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

She answered the door is this nightgown that barely covered her buns, and she clearly had nothing on under it. Yeah.....hard to stay focused with a body like she has; nice face too.

Does she have stretch marks on her penis too?

I do. I had a major phallic growth spurt. #BPM

upstatedoc · 05-10-2021, 02:08 PM

Is the sitting while peeing a Canadian thing? Isn't Alfisti Canadian to?

EME_Bounce · 05-10-2021, 02:12 PM

Confession:

A few years back, as an adult, I went back home for Christmas vacation. We had a lot of beverages before bed and I got up a few times to drain the main vein.

In the morning over breakfast my mom said, "I noticed you boys still don't turn on the lights when you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Why don't you turn the lights on and how do you see to hit the toilet?"

I said, "you just pee until you hear it hitting the water, then you know you're on target".

Her face was priceless with the realization of cleaning up years of pee.

My other brother said a moment later, "I just go in the sink".

My poor mom had 3 of us.

TiMSport · 05-10-2021, 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Is the sitting while peeing a Canadian thing? Isn't Alfisti Canadian to?

Lol, that would be the first I've heard of such a thing.

King Rudi · 05-10-2021, 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I definitely sit in the wee hours of the morning while taking a piss. At that point, I'm not interested in keeping my eyes open for any longer than is absolutely necessary to successfully navigate my way to the toilet without stubbing a toe.

Had to learn to Superman that first go in the morn; especially if the night before was riddled with alcohol. I found sitting down, in the dark, in the wee hours (pun intended), lead to a quick relapse of sleep culminating in being woke up by falling off the toilet into the floor. It only happened once, but it won't happen again.

2one3E90 · 05-10-2021, 05:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2one3E90

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

I saw a hot meth-head. True story! She had a killer derrière!!!! I know, I know. She was a unicorn among meth-heads. #wouldyoudoitthough?!?

If your a cop wouldnt you have a like dirty thoughts like arresting her then tryna find something on her then punishing her urself instead of booking her in

She kinda hit on me the other night when my partner and I responded to her residence. I had contacted her prior, but I didn't recognize her as easily with her hair shorter. She recognized me though, and then it all came back. She answered the door is this nightgown that barely covered her buns, and she clearly had nothing on under it. Yeah.....hard to stay focused with a body like she has; nice face too.

Scary. what u guys go thru. Doesnt it smell gross the crack meth people?

2one3E90 · 05-10-2021, 05:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eme_bounce

Quote:

Originally Posted by alfisti

we have 2 boys and so does my sister in law. They teach theirs to pee standing up and i am hardcore against it. Men are being emasculated enough as is, they are born to stand peeing, don't make them beta males.

could you re-read this and get back to us with an edit?

hahaha i know some beta males.

Sedan_Clan · 05-10-2021, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2one3E90

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2one3E90

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

I saw a hot meth-head. True story! She had a killer derrière!!!! I know, I know. She was a unicorn among meth-heads. #wouldyoudoitthough?!?

If your a cop wouldnt you have a like dirty thoughts like arresting her then tryna find something on her then punishing her urself instead of booking her in

She kinda hit on me the other night when my partner and I responded to her residence. I had contacted her prior, but I didn't recognize her as easily with her hair shorter. She recognized me though, and then it all came back. She answered the door is this nightgown that barely covered her buns, and she clearly had nothing on under it. Yeah.....hard to stay focused with a body like she has; nice face too.

Scary. what u guys go thru. Doesnt it smell gross the crack meth people?

Once they are far gone, yeah......but, part of that comes from them being homeless much of the time.

1MOREMOD · 05-10-2021, 07:20 PM

Whats with dudes that pee with their hand or hands on the wall. Just general germs and now covid why touch anything in a public bathroom.

Darth One · 05-10-2021, 07:29 PM

It’s for balance and leverage. This is one of those times when the job demands it...just like when you’re playing on the line or at running back

1MOREMOD · 05-10-2021, 08:06 PM

So its for old people who can't stand up on their own?

Buug959 · 05-10-2021, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD

So its for old people who can't stand up on their own?

Wrong thread.

1MOREMOD · 05-10-2021, 10:54 PM

I know but this devolved into men sitting to pee which i can't understand either.

05-10-2021, 01:59 PM	#5266
Esteban Major General 51012 Rep 7,235 Posts Drives: a slow car fast Join Date: Jun 2014 Location: SoCal iTrader: (0)	Time for some pee jokes: Where is the best place to go pee? IP Address I saw a sign today that made me pee myself. It said, "TOILETS CLOSED." Do you know why women fart after they pee? They can't shake it so they need to blow dry. Yes, I looked them up. lol And yes, they're dumb, I know.
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05-10-2021, 02:08 PM	#5269
upstatedoc I'll get back to you 7528 Rep 2,132 Posts Drives: blue streak Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: not downstate iTrader: (2)	Is the sitting while peeing a Canadian thing? Isn't Alfisti Canadian to? __________________ 2018 Stinger GT 2009 E90 N51 /Active Autowerke Stage 2 tune/BMW Performance Exhaust/ Countermeasure enthusiast.
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05-10-2021, 02:12 PM	#5270
EME_Bounce New Member 85 Rep 7 Posts Drives: 2021 X30e Join Date: Mar 2021 Location: Earth iTrader: (0)	Confession: A few years back, as an adult, I went back home for Christmas vacation. We had a lot of beverages before bed and I got up a few times to drain the main vein. In the morning over breakfast my mom said, "I noticed you boys still don't turn on the lights when you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Why don't you turn the lights on and how do you see to hit the toilet?" I said, "you just pee until you hear it hitting the water, then you know you're on target". Her face was priceless with the realization of cleaning up years of pee. My other brother said a moment later, "I just go in the sink". My poor mom had 3 of us.
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05-10-2021, 07:20 PM	#5276
1MOREMOD - 11809 Rep 23,186 Posts Drives: Race car-> Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: check your mirrors iTrader: (5)	Whats with dudes that pee with their hand or hands on the wall. Just general germs and now covid why touch anything in a public bathroom.
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05-10-2021, 07:29 PM	#5277
Darth One drunk poster 6607 Rep 3,649 Posts Drives: M4 GTS \| E46 M3 Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: FL iTrader: (0)	It’s for balance and leverage. This is one of those times when the job demands it...just like when you’re playing on the line or at running back
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05-10-2021, 08:06 PM	#5278
1MOREMOD - 11809 Rep 23,186 Posts Drives: Race car-> Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: check your mirrors iTrader: (5)	So its for old people who can't stand up on their own?
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05-10-2021, 10:54 PM	#5280
1MOREMOD - 11809 Rep 23,186 Posts Drives: Race car-> Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: check your mirrors iTrader: (5)	I know but this devolved into men sitting to pee which i can't understand either.
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