Marriage Lessons

[Esteban]

Mistakes I've made:

Too many to list here.

[ShopVac]

Originally Posted by 3.0L

^This.

We celebrated 53 years this past February. We met 58 years ago.

Also, look at the ring on your finger every now and then, and remember your marriage vows.

Lost my wedding ring within the first year. I think my wife lost her's (tied to the engagement ring too) about 15 years ago. Maybe the lesson is to not spend so much on the rings.

Also, the wife made me memorize our vows, said it would mean more...in which I needed to write the first word of each sentence on my wrist to remember them the day of. She was a little pissed as we were holding hands in front of 200+, and I'm trying to stretch my arms out to get the words out. Good think we said 'no video'.

[F32Fleet]

In some ways you're marrying your mother in law because your girlfriend will turn into her despite her best efforts not to.

Don't get bitter when she hits the wall and your buddies wives have not.

Just passing this along to the next person.

[avantegardestyle]

IF YOU ARE NOT RELIGIOUS, don't get married........

[avantegardestyle]

If Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk or Kanye West can't keep their women, why will you be able to keep yours without PURE LUCK of marrying a really good woman?

Go watch Johnny Depps Dilema

[Bunnny]

Originally Posted by ShopVac

Lost my wedding ring within the first year. I think my wife lost her's (tied to the engagement ring too) about 15 years ago. Maybe the lesson is to not spend so much on the rings.

Also, the wife made me memorize our vows, said it would mean more...in which I needed to write the first word of each sentence on my wrist to remember them the day of. She was a little pissed as we were holding hands in front of 200+, and I'm trying to stretch my arms out to get the words out. Good think we said 'no video'.

My advice is "if its not a Fuck YEAH! its certainly a fuck no.
Im glad I did not make this mistake, but I've seen so many people do this. Its a very expensive mistake to make, so pick carefully!!


And not every woman is so picky.
I picked simple bands, and asked my husband to marry me. We threw a party for mostly friends and the family that calls. Our vows were just our "I do"s, and that was enough for me (Very happy I did that in retrospect, due to the amount of stress and emotions going on that day). We an open bar, and a ton of happy memories for everyone. My friend and my brother in law had ties on their heads by the end of the night. It was a blast and everyone smiles when we talk about it.

And yes, look at the parents, but this is also a careful judgement call. They could resent their parent's lifestyle and be quite the opposite. An example is a parent that smokes/drinks/sedentary lifestyle, and their kid grows up to be a complete fitness nut.

[G MONEY]

Make sure your side chicks keep their mouth shut and don't fall in love with them:-)

[floridaorange]

Originally Posted by Esteban

Mistakes I've made:

Too many to list here.

Meaning, if anyone has any specific accounts of mistakes they could have avoided that clearly lead to their marriage ending or the relationship greatly deteriorating.

[happyjack]

Originally Posted by KennyFSU

Also, don't go to bed mad at other.

nah. this is the one piece of advice i always tell newlyweds they should forget about as soon as possible. it seems like everyone gets this advice on their wedding day and it just sets completely unrealistic expectations.

there will be arguments when it seems you’re both set in your position. if you get to a point where the only words you’re exchanging are blames and insults, then it’s time to stop the conversation before you say something that you will truly regret. my wife and I have agreed that when one of us is about to go nuclear then we end the discussion with the following: “sweetie, I love you, but I cannot talk about this anymore right now. I need some time to reflect.”

sometimes a good night’s sleep will change perspectives.

my wife and I will celebrate 30 years married later this year.

[Alfisti]

I am going to upset the women in this thread.

The marriages I have seen work best are where the woman clearly feels the man is a leader. They will never admit to it because it is sexist but the moment a woman feels like you are not "in control and in charge" she starts to doubt you, this leads to indecision and conflict. Like I said, this will upset the women here. But I have seen it.

Now this doesn't mean the man calls all the shots and makes all the decisions, but it means the women has faith in the man to pull the family in the direction it needs to go and get the big calls right.

Fire away.

[vreihen16]

Originally Posted by ShopVac

Also, the wife made me memorize our vows, said it would mean more...in which I needed to write the first word of each sentence on my wrist to remember them the day of.

I wrote the complete 5-page script for our wedding! Justice's complete ceremony, entrance and exit processional order, camera angles, vows, site safety plan, you name it. Not that I'm son of bridezilla, but the ceremony was in a live motorsports pit/paddock and there isn't exactly a pre-canned ceremony script that would work (and keep non-racer family guests from getting injured).....

[Esteban]

Originally Posted by floridaorange

Meaning, if anyone has any specific accounts of mistakes they could have avoided that clearly lead to their marriage ending or the relationship greatly deteriorating.

All I'm trying to say is I've made a ton of mistakes, most of them too trivial to post here. The important thing is to get over them and move on.

Yes, I try to learn from them and avoid making the same ones again.

Sorry I'm not giving you detail. Sometimes I think you have to make them to avoid doing it again.

[Burnt C6]

Stay out of the Strip Bars.

[happyjack]

Originally Posted by Burnt C6

Stay out of the Strip Bars.

UNLESS...your spouse enjoys said establishments equally, and you both abide the rules you've jointly set when patronizing said establishments

[Tyga11]

Originally Posted by Alfisti

I am going to upset the women in this thread.

The marriages I have seen work best are where the woman clearly feels the man is a leader. They will never admit to it because it is sexist but the moment a woman feels like you are not "in control and in charge" she starts to doubt you, this leads to indecision and conflict. Like I said, this will upset the women here. But I have seen it.

Now this doesn't mean the man calls all the shots and makes all the decisions, but it means the women has faith in the man to pull the family in the direction it needs to go and get the big calls right.

Fire away.

We are animals at the end of the day. You are spot on.

[aguywalksintoabar]

😉

[G30M]

half my life done and still not getting it right *sigh

[R N M]

IF you plan to get married, the only reason should be to have kids otherwise I don’t see much of a point.

If you plan to have kids, then make sure the woman you choose “wants” to raise a family. Most of the responsibilities fall on them and they will make your life miserable if they feel that you are not doing your part.
Look at how their family dynamics are as that is good indication of how they will raise your kids…

[Mosaud1998]

Eh, how this generation is. I'd rather stay single and do me. Thuggin' dolo

[floridaorange]

Sad. The pornography generation seems to either be hyper conservative traditionalists or carefree non committal confused bisexuals.

[Mosaud1998]

Originally Posted by floridaorange

Sad. The pornography generation seems to either be hyper conservative traditionalists or carefree non committal confused bisexuals.

Exactly

[Bunnny]

Originally Posted by Alfisti

I am going to upset the women in this thread.

The marriages I have seen work best are where the woman clearly feels the man is a leader. They will never admit to it because it is sexist but the moment a woman feels like you are not "in control and in charge" she starts to doubt you, this leads to indecision and conflict. Like I said, this will upset the women here. But I have seen it.

Now this doesn't mean the man calls all the shots and makes all the decisions, but it means the women has faith in the man to pull the family in the direction it needs to go and get the big calls right.

Fire away.

*pew! pew!* lol...

I actually agree with you. A man's (or strong partner's) containment
allow us to feel safe, and grow/flourish. It encourages us to be our best, and if the relationship metrics are proper, it all gets returned accordingly.