If you're going to be jerk... admit it

[cxp213]

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

I give everyone the benefit of the doubt the first time. It's not hard to be polite. I refuse to let the rude people win by them changing my behavior to others. If however I enter double doors, hold the first one and don't get a thank you, I will let the second one go in their face.

Just curious, but other than "being polite" for no reason at all, what does holding a door for someone (or vice versa) really achieve for either parties? Clearly this affects you enough to rant, so just wondering if the outcome (when desirable) is worth the hassle and stress (when you're not returned the kind gesture).

Originally Posted by HockeyDad

Ahh, driving in North Texas. I swear, we have some of the worst drivers in the country! And yes, it's typically asshats in pick ups that are the worst offenders. That, and Nissan Altimas. Its amazing how poorly people drive here...

Bigger cities have worse and more assholes than DFW. What DFW wins on is in the sheer number of dumbass, incompetent drivers any time anything falls from the sky.

[cmyx6go]

Originally Posted by jgoens

I get plenty of women who hold the door open, as in they pass in and hold for me to grab it. And then there are a few who hold the door for me to pass first....which puts me a bit off-guard.

I follow the who got there first rule. I don't assume and rush in first. If a gentleman allows me to go first I will then let him go in front of me if it's someplace that has a line like a Starbucks or Dunkin.

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

I give everyone the benefit of the doubt the first time. It's not hard to be polite. I refuse to let the rude people win by them changing my behavior to others. If however I enter double doors, hold the first one and don't get a thank you, I will let the second one go in their face.

I've spent a lot of time in NYC both for work and entertainment and I hate to say it but the common courtesy we exercise in the south is nearly nonexistent there. I was in a busy bar/restaurant and once stopped to let a waitress pass who was carrying a serious load. She refused to go and I said, "Please go ahead. We let ladies pass first...I'm from the south". She said, "I'm sorry. (Quipping about living in the south.) So I gave it right back..."I'm sorry you're not a lady". I didn't hang around to see what she remarked as I was pretty steamed at that point.

I tell people what's on my mind nearly always. I'm nearly always polite but I do tell them. If cars are involved all bets are off. If another driver screws up and is unrepentant, I nuke them. Horn, flipping off...the whole 9 yards.
Screw 'em.

[cmyx6go]

Originally Posted by cxp213

Just curious, but other than "being polite" for no reason at all, what does holding a door for someone (or vice versa) really achieve for either parties?

Uhhh, it's the right thing to do. It's in my DNA. I was raised to be polite. How much effort does is take? It makes the other person smile (usually). It's appreciated. Sometimes the smallest act can turn a persons day around. Maybe someone who is down has their faith in humanity restored.

[SakhirM4]

Originally Posted by cxp213

Just curious, but other than "being polite" for no reason at all, what does holding a door for someone (or vice versa) really achieve for either parties? Clearly this affects you enough to rant, so just wondering if the outcome (when desirable) is worth the hassle and stress (when you're not returned the kind gesture).

You seem like a wonderful person to be around. So kindness, and courtesy, and caring etc. need to be based on what is in it for you? What does it achieve? That's a really sad way to live life.

[jgoens]

Originally Posted by MKSixer

I'm nearly always polite but I do tell them. If cars are involved all bets are off. If another driver screws up and is unrepentant, I nuke them. Horn, flipping off...the whole 9 yards.
Screw 'em.

Yeah, I too have noticed people with electric cars ie...Teslas, prius's, Leafs, i3...ahem..etc etc...seem,to have driving issues.

[cxp213]

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

Uhhh, it's the right thing to do. It's in my DNA. I was raised to be polite. How much effort does is take? It makes the other person smile (usually). It's appreciated. Sometimes the smallest act can turn a persons day around. Maybe someone who is down has their faith in humanity restored.

It's not the "right" thing to do, just a "polite gesture" -- there's a big difference. It's nice and appreciated but not a requirement nor is it wrong not to do so.

Just because you were raised to hold doors doesn't mean everybody else was.
Just because you're willing to do so doesn't mean everybody will want to do the same.

Originally Posted by SakhirM4

You seem like a wonderful person to be around. So kindness, and courtesy, and caring etc. need to be based on what is in it for you? What does it achieve? That's a really sad way to live life.

Yeah, life of the party.

It doesn't need to be based on anything. If you're willing to be kind, courteous, and caring then just do it without expecting them to return that same gesture and don't get mad if they don't. There are more important things to be upset about, especially when it's not a law, requirement, etc.

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by jgoens

Yeah, I too have noticed people with electruc cars ie...Teslas, prius's, Leafs, i3...ahem..etc etc...seem,to have driving issues.

Did you not see my warning about cars being involved!!

[SakhirM4]

Originally Posted by cxp213

It's not the "right" thing to do, just a "polite gesture" -- there's a big difference. It's nice and appreciated but not a requirement nor is it wrong not to do so.

Just because you were raised to hold doors doesn't mean everybody else was.
Just because you're willing to do so doesn't mean everybody will want to do the same.


Yeah, life of the party.

It doesn't need to be based on anything. If you're willing to be kind, courteous, and caring then just do it without expecting them to return that same gesture and don't get mad if they don't. There are more important things to be upset about, especially when it's not a law, requirement, etc.

Really, really sad....

[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by cxp213

It's not the "right" thing to do, just a "polite gesture" -- there's a big difference. It's nice and appreciated but not a requirement nor is it wrong not to do so.

Just because you were raised to hold doors doesn't mean everybody else was.
Just because you're willing to do so doesn't mean everybody will want to do the same.


Yeah, life of the party.

It doesn't need to be based on anything. If you're willing to be kind, courteous, and caring then just do it without expecting them to return that same gesture and don't get mad if they don't. There are more important things to be upset about, especially when it's not a law, requirement, etc.

Social Contract. More important than laws. It's how we stay civilized.

[jgoens]

Originally Posted by SakhirM4

Really, really sad....

There is still a difference between humans and robots, yet they are approaching one another.

[cxp213]

Originally Posted by SakhirM4

Really, really sad....

Cry me a river

Originally Posted by MKSixer

Social Contract. More important than laws. It's how we stay civilized.

Agreed, although I'm not sure if it's more or less important than laws.

[BSM n54iS]

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

Hey! I'm a woman. I hold doors open for everyone. I step out of the way if someone got to the door first. You can't stereotype all women as entitled princesses.

Had a girl hold the door for me while we were walking into the gym, I was a few steps behind and almost couldn't believe she waited for me to catch up. I got the second door for her of course, but almost choked on the words 'thank you!' as she was holding it lol.

It's very very rare but I do remember when it happens.

[BSM n54iS]

Originally Posted by HockeyDad

Ahh, driving in North Texas. I swear, we have some of the worst drivers in the country! And yes, it's typically asshats in pick ups that are the worst offenders. That, and Nissan Altimas. Its amazing how poorly people drive here...

Dude I'd give anything to transplant my old TX aggressive, road raged drivers with the imbeciles out here on the West coast

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by jaye944

Majority of people are ignorant, classless and rude.
Get thoes people behind a wheel and they become self absorbed pricks, prickettes

People make driving mistakes and often a hand in the air to say sorry works wonders.
Funnily enough a guy driving a BMW (many years ago) instantly deflated a possible road rage incident.

But women,,, don't get me started on them.

Your supposed to hold a door open, move to a side (if the walk way is narrow)
pull a seat. fuk dat

too many times they just breeze on down/through or by self entitled princess's

but you just don't show the courtesy and you'll get

"Oh don't you have any manners"

fuk dat

Calls people ignorant classless and rude. Proves ignorant, classless and rude in same post.

[jaye944]

I'm sure there are some...
I would hazard a guess 90% of the time is my expereince.
The exception not the rule.

BUT... go back say 30 years ? 20 maybe, then pretty much "EVERYONE"
you where polite to waved, smiled, said thanks.

now.. pffft

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

Hey! I'm a woman. I hold doors open for everyone. I step out of the way if someone got to the door first. You can't stereotype all women as entitled princesses.

[are0lies]

Originally Posted by SakhirM4

Really, really sad....

Agreed. Rather sad when "doing unto others..." devolves into a disagreement.

[allinon72]

It's to the point where I don't even like being in public. I go out of my way to mind my own business, but folks find a way to ruin my mood every time.

If you really want to test your mettle, go to Costco on a Saturday.

[are0lies]

Originally Posted by cxp213

I'm not disagreeing about being nice. I'm disagreeing about its perceived requirements from the sensitive people in this thread.

I understand, but the premise of this is adding something positive to an already fucked up world in which we live in, without having to add to the negative. Nobody forces anything on anybody, but adding positive only returns it. Your life your choice, whatever makes you happy.

[King Rudi]

Something I've noticed in my day to day, it isn't always a kind gesture being paid as much as perception. A person can go out of their way to be polite to someone but regardless of intent or repeated attempts, the individuals perception is key. If the other individual is having an off day or is just a jack ass in general, you kind actions mean nothing. This also works in the reverse fashion once the person shows no form of respect for a kind gesture made. I guess my point is treat everyone with respect whether you gain respect in return or not. In the event that no respect is given, you continue to act like a gentleman or a lady; if they persist it says nothing of you but everything of them. The person in question may be an asshole but everyone else around will take notice.

[N55darksoul]

Driving fast and crazy is hateful for sure. However, I personally can not stand the slower then speed limit crowd either.
Its 45 MPH and they want to go 39. Typically soccer moms on their phones trying to text....yuk

[N55darksoul]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

Something I've noticed in my day to day, it isn't always a kind gesture being paid as much as perception. A person can go out of their way to be polite to someone but regardless of intent or repeated attempts, the individuals perception is key. If the other individual is having an off day or is just a jack ass in general, you kind actions mean nothing. This also works in the reverse fashion once the person shows no form of respect for a kind gesture made. I guess my point is treat everyone with respect whether you gain respect in return or not. In the event that no respect is given, you continue to give respect; if they persist it says nothing of you but everything of them.

Truth ^^^ but most people would consider that being a wimp... Just sayin..