New to Universal Forums

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 02:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MsGoGoMoto

I want to hear all your fart stories.

…..

Not enough space for all of them... so you'll have to pick and choose a select few.

What is your fart of choice?

Silent ninja
Explosive
Sharts
Machine gun
False alarm
Blame game

I'm sure there's more but I'm no expert.

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 02:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unluky

Check out the "COVID Vaccine" thread - give you a very small taste......

ah yessssss

TiMSport · 08-11-2021, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

The ratio here is not to my liking...

LOL. Me neither.

MsGoGoMoto · 08-11-2021, 04:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unluky

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

I can only imagine the dumpster fire....

Check out the "COVID Vaccine" thread - give you a very small taste......

This made me laugh. I just laughed and sounded like my motorcycle did when trying to start it with a weak battery.
Heuuuh, heuuuugh, heuuuuugh!

MsGoGoMoto · 08-11-2021, 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

Quote:

Originally Posted by MsGoGoMoto

I want to hear all your fart stories.

…..

Not enough space for all of them... so you'll have to pick and choose a select few.

What is your fart of choice?

Silent ninja
Explosive
Sharts
Machine gun
False alarm
Blame game

I'm sure there's more but I'm no expert.

I think you're got them all. I'm proud!

TiMSport · 08-11-2021, 04:22 PM

How about a "letdown fart"? The one where you think you're gonna let a big one rip and it ends up being a small, quiet one.

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TiMSport

How about a "letdown fart"? The one where you think you're gonna let a big one rip and it ends up being a small, quiet one.

It just means you lacked determination

TiMSport · 08-11-2021, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

It just means you lacked determination

One might think that. Have you ever been so determined that it led to a shart?

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TiMSport

One might think that. Have you ever been so determined that it led to a shart?

In my younger days I succumbed to many sharts. But now I'm a master of force and control.

TiMSport · 08-11-2021, 04:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

In my younger days I succumbed to many sharts. But now I'm a master of force and control.

Ahh the Yoda of farts. Nice.

Dpc2u · 08-11-2021, 06:30 PM

Speaking of farts.....
Wow, who would of thought...........

Well, we kid you not: there's a job in China called a professional fart smeller, and it pays up to $70,000 a year for you to whiff farts by others. ... According to them, a fart can tell the health condition of a person. For example, a fishy fart smell would suggest an infection in the person's digestive system.

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 07:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dpc2u

Speaking of farts.....
Wow, who would of thought...........

Well, we kid you not: there's a job in China called a professional fart smeller, and it pays up to $70,000 a year for you to whiff farts by others. ... According to them, a fart can tell the health condition of a person. For example, a fishy fart smell would suggest an infection in the person's digestive system.

That's not nearly enough money for that line of work....

TiMSport · 08-11-2021, 08:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

That's not nearly enough money for that line of work....

What would your minimum be to take the position?

MsGoGoMoto · 08-11-2021, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TiMSport

How about a "letdown fart"? The one where you think you're gonna let a big one rip and it ends up being a small, quiet one.

Looooooool..
I mean.
Thats like a fart being a turd.
How about naming farts after animals?
Childhood days, little brother came up with
Swollen goose
Broken hornet
Deflated gobbler
Naked hog
Duck-walk fart
The chair slide
Joggin shart
Lean and squeeze
Heat miser

…sad thing is, 4 days ago, we were on the phone and he had me on speaker.. squeaked by a fart and asked me what to name it.. some how, we REMEMBER all the fart names 40 years later.. Jesus.

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TiMSport

What would your minimum be to take the position?

Add an extra 0 at the end and I'll put in my 2 weeks at my current job.

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MsGoGoMoto

Looooooool..
Lean and squeeze

ah yes this is a satisfying one...

fiveohwblow · 08-11-2021, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

Add an extra 0 at the end and I'll put in my 2 weeks at my current job.

And THESE are the real moments I wish I was dummy rich.

Dpc2u · 08-11-2021, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fiveohwblow

Quote:

Originally Posted by wtwo3

Add an extra 0 at the end and I'll put in my 2 weeks at my current job.

And THESE are the real moments I wish I was dummy rich.

Are you saying if you were filthy rich you would pay him the 700k to see him sniff farts all day for entertainment?

fiveohwblow · 08-11-2021, 08:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dpc2u

Are you saying if you were filthy rich you would pay him the 700k to see him sniff farts all day for entertainment?

Fuckin a right I would

TiMSport · 08-11-2021, 08:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fiveohwblow

Fuckin a right I would

LOL. You'd be supervising it just to make sure he's taking it all in. Money well spent.

MsGoGoMoto · 08-11-2021, 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TiMSport

Quote:

Originally Posted by fiveohwblow

Fuckin a right I would

LOL. You'd be supervising it just to make sure he's taking it all in. Money well spent.

I just almost pee-laughed

So damn stoned man

wtwo3 · 08-11-2021, 08:57 PM

Hey if there's a market for this I should up my salary requirements.... maybe get a spot on TruTV.

08-11-2021, 04:22 PM	#28
TiMSport Banned 12844 Rep 2,983 Posts Drives: '21 M340i xDrive, '17 Audi S3 Join Date: Feb 2021 Location: ATL iTrader: (0)	How about a "letdown fart"? The one where you think you're gonna let a big one rip and it ends up being a small, quiet one.
	Appreciate 1 MsGoGoMoto1227.00 Quote

08-11-2021, 06:30 PM	#33
Dpc2u Major 11491 Rep 1,065 Posts Drives: E93 M3, E60 M5, F15 X5, E46 Join Date: Feb 2019 Location: Middle Tennessee iTrader: (0)	Speaking of farts..... Wow, who would of thought........... Well, we kid you not: there's a job in China called a professional fart smeller, and it pays up to $70,000 a year for you to whiff farts by others. ... According to them, a fart can tell the health condition of a person. For example, a fishy fart smell would suggest an infection in the person's digestive system. __________________ E46, E60 M5, E93 M3, F15 X5 IG - @thebimmerhaus
	Appreciate 1 wtwo319019.00 Quote

08-11-2021, 08:57 PM	#44
wtwo3 Major General 19019 Rep 5,664 Posts Drives: 23 X7 40i; 23 M3; 24 cooper s Join Date: Aug 2019 Location: IL iTrader: (0) Garage List 2024 Mini Cooper S ... [10.00] 2023 BMW M3 [9.40] 2023 BMW X7 40i [9.75]	Hey if there's a market for this I should up my salary requirements.... maybe get a spot on TruTV. __________________ 2023 BMW X7 xDrive40i 2023 BMW M3 6MT 2024 Mini Cooper S Convertible '20 BMW m340i... '20 BMW X5 40i... '16 Infiniti Q50 RS 400... '10 Lexus RX 350... '08 Lexus IS 350... '00 Nissan Maxima... '93 Nissan Maxima
	Appreciate 0 Quote