I'm Proud to introduce: the SAFETY SLINGER (TM)

Alpine Whiteboy · 03-01-2012, 07:06 AM

Hey guys,

I don't know what happened to the other thread, but for those of you that don't know, there is a member on here whos step-father invented a product called the "Flip Flasher" which is going to save hubdreds of thousands of lives!

Well, in competition with him to get MY product on the shelf at Walmart, I would like to introduce to you, the SAFETY SLINGER! (TM).

Imagine this, your riding along owning the road on your bicycle when all of a sudden some d-bag car "enthusiast" drinking a mocha-frappa-caramel-blended cream extra whip no-foam latte is talking or texting on their phone when all of a sudden BAM! They SMASH into your precious over-priced bicycle!! OUCHY-WAWA!! Now I know what your thinking? DEAD! Right? No-siree-Bob you sure aren't! "why not?" you ask??? The SAFETY SLINGER! (TM) THAT'S why!

Here's how it works. Now what would normally be the outcome of an accident such as this one? Well for one you would go flying off your bicycle like a bat out of hell head first up the hood of a car and blast somebody's windshield with your face of course! But with the SAFETY SLINGER (TM) this is COMPLETELY AVOIDABLE according to me! The Slinger acts as a safety harness which simply straps YOUR very own body to your bicycle. Now when you are hit by somebody who is looking for an address, you no longer go flying off your bicycle into a flaming death fireball! Yay!

So please vote for me guys! Thanks!

FFM · 03-01-2012, 07:09 AM

Based on that schematic I believe this is the superior product. Well done to u sir.

fokus45 · 03-01-2012, 07:13 AM

Holy moley. Lmao!

KingOfJericho · 03-01-2012, 07:14 AM

IBTL

escobar929 · 03-01-2012, 07:49 AM

60% of the time, it works every time

boymonkey · 03-01-2012, 08:20 AM

A seat belt for the bicycle, it's so obvious, why didn't I think of it??!!

Alpine Whiteboy · 03-01-2012, 09:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by boymonkey

A seat belt for the bicycle, it's so obvious, why didn't I think of it??!!

You my friend, are going to be AMAZED at my new product I'm working on; the BABY BUMPER (TM)!

It's an AirBag for your Bicycle child seat!

JUST LOOK HOW SAFE WHEN COMBINED WITH THE SAFETY SLINGER!!

E90SoFlo · 03-01-2012, 09:24 AM

Sad thing is, I bet you could sell this

Comet · 03-01-2012, 10:09 AM

win thread is win

TroyDeJ · 03-01-2012, 10:25 AM

bahahahaha

immiketoo · 03-01-2012, 10:46 AM

Awesome!

CollinsE90 · 03-01-2012, 12:40 PM

I approve your attempt, but the funny lacks.

Wakka · 03-01-2012, 12:46 PM

I was about to flip a shit when i saw thread title... pleasantly surprised, not very funny... but surprising.

Bobble · 03-01-2012, 04:20 PM

Paging Ron Popeil, he'll get this to market and infomercials to boot. You sir will be a zillionaire someday

Gavin@MMW · 03-01-2012, 05:12 PM

Group Buy?

E90Mario · 03-01-2012, 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gavin@MMW

Group Buy?

1. Gavin@MMW
2. MARIO K
3.

DieselDiner · 03-01-2012, 05:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gavin@MMW

Group Buy?

LOL Gavin FTW

AllydNYC · 03-01-2012, 05:52 PM

10/10

Great OC.

E90SoFlo · 03-01-2012, 06:13 PM

When Are You Updating The Maps!! Omfg I Need The New Maps Please.

03-01-2012, 07:06 AM	#1
Alpine Whiteboy Jerry's Fault... 177 Rep 9,258 Posts Drives: 2013 535xi M-Sport SGM Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Queens, N.Y. iTrader: (1)	I'm Proud to introduce: the SAFETY SLINGER (TM) Hey guys, I don't know what happened to the other thread, but for those of you that don't know, there is a member on here whos step-father invented a product called the "Flip Flasher" which is going to save hubdreds of thousands of lives! Well, in competition with him to get MY product on the shelf at Walmart, I would like to introduce to you, the SAFETY SLINGER! (TM). Imagine this, your riding along owning the road on your bicycle when all of a sudden some d-bag car "enthusiast" drinking a mocha-frappa-caramel-blended cream extra whip no-foam latte is talking or texting on their phone when all of a sudden BAM! They SMASH into your precious over-priced bicycle!! OUCHY-WAWA!! Now I know what your thinking? DEAD! Right? No-siree-Bob you sure aren't! "why not?" you ask??? The SAFETY SLINGER! (TM) THAT'S why! Here's how it works. Now what would normally be the outcome of an accident such as this one? Well for one you would go flying off your bicycle like a bat out of hell head first up the hood of a car and blast somebody's windshield with your face of course! But with the SAFETY SLINGER (TM) this is COMPLETELY AVOIDABLE according to me! The Slinger acts as a safety harness which simply straps YOUR very own body to your bicycle. Now when you are hit by somebody who is looking for an address, you no longer go flying off your bicycle into a flaming death fireball! Yay! So please vote for me guys! Thanks! __________________ *BoopieMotorwerks MartinoAutoConcepts**
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03-01-2012, 07:09 AM	#2
FFM PLEB R8 62 Rep 288 Posts Drives: B9 SQ5 \| R8 V8 6MT Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: Bellingham, WA iTrader: (0)	Based on that schematic I believe this is the superior product. Well done to u sir. __________________ Current: R8 V8 6MT \| B9 SQ5
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03-01-2012, 07:13 AM	#3
fokus45 Enlisted Member 0 Rep 43 Posts Drives: little blue dune buggy Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: WY iTrader: (0)	Holy moley. Lmao!
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03-01-2012, 07:14 AM	#4
KingOfJericho Major General 2458 Rep 7,341 Posts Drives: Yes Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: CT iTrader: (1) Garage List 2010 135i Coupe [5.26]	IBTL __________________ The views and opinions expressed in this post are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Bimmerpost. 2018 Jeep Grand Cherokee High Altitude Hemi \| 2010 S4 Sold \| 2010 BMW 135i Retired \| 2006 Lotus Exige Sold
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03-01-2012, 07:49 AM	#5
escobar929 Brigadier General 154 Rep 4,528 Posts Drives: M2 CS Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Hollywood, FL iTrader: (14) Garage List 2020 M2 CS [10.00] 2020 M240i [0.00]	60% of the time, it works every time
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03-01-2012, 08:20 AM	#6
boymonkey Lieutenant 41 Rep 530 Posts Drives: slow Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Canada iTrader: (0)	A seat belt for the bicycle, it's so obvious, why didn't I think of it??!!
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03-01-2012, 09:24 AM	#8
E90SoFlo Banned 213 Rep 2,669 Posts Drives: E90 335i Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Naples, FL iTrader: (9)	Sad thing is, I bet you could sell this
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03-01-2012, 10:09 AM	#9
Comet Troll Harder 403 Rep 596 Posts Drives: 997 GT3, 997 4 GTS, X6M Join Date: May 2007 Location: Montreal, Beirut iTrader: (0) Garage List 2011 Porsche GT3 [8.00] 2012 Porsche 4 GTS [5.34]	win thread is win __________________
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03-01-2012, 10:25 AM	#10
TroyDeJ Banned 84 Rep 984 Posts Drives: around aimlessly Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Long Island iTrader: (1)	bahahahaha
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03-01-2012, 12:40 PM	#12
CollinsE90 Where my bitches 771 Rep 1,924 Posts Drives: Cadillac coupe deville Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: street corner checking profits iTrader: (0)	I approve your attempt, but the funny lacks. __________________
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03-01-2012, 04:20 PM	#14
Bobble Major 56 Rep 1,232 Posts Drives: Whatever POS the wife leaves Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: SoCal iTrader: (1)	Paging Ron Popeil, he'll get this to market and infomercials to boot. You sir will be a zillionaire someday
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03-01-2012, 05:12 PM	#15
Gavin@MMW Brigadier General 428 Rep 3,879 Posts Drives: MMW Supercharged E90 328i Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: 818/805 iTrader: (18)	Group Buy?
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03-01-2012, 05:52 PM	#18
AllydNYC Loading... 359 Rep 2,187 Posts Drives: 91' E30 318is Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Location iTrader: (15) Garage List 1991 BMW 318is [0.00]	10/10 Great OC.
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03-01-2012, 06:13 PM	#19
E90SoFlo Banned 213 Rep 2,669 Posts Drives: E90 335i Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Naples, FL iTrader: (9)	When Are You Updating The Maps!! Omfg I Need The New Maps Please.
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