Quote:
Originally Posted by KingOfJericho
I hope this doesn't come off the wrong way but your outlook on marriage and children almost guarantees that you'll end up alone. You've said you had a rough childhood with divorce, etc, but you also have to understand that they don't all end up as negative an experience as you perceive them to be or as you've experienced. Your views are those of someone who grew up not learning how to share or interact properly in a family unit. That kid on the playground playing by himself because every time someone gets close to him he yells "MINE! GET AWAY!".
My cousins uncle was told at an early age that women are only after his family money. It affected him so deeply that he is now 55 and still alone. His house is immaculate, he drives a beautiful car, he also probably still has the first dollar he ever earned, but that's because he never allowed anyone in to share in his life because he always associated relationships with "losing" something that was his. Again... that lonely kid in the sandbox.
You either learn to give of yourself and form meaningful relationships or you end up alone. It's as simple as that. The contract is in place because many marriages DO end in divorce and often times the wife, who would bust her ass raising children, etc, would be left destitute when the father decided he wanted to end it and walked off with all of the money and housing since he paid for it all. In many cases, the contract is necessary.
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Look- most people don't examine why they believe certain things, or why they like certain things. I believe they don't even know- they're just socially conditioned to go a certain way. I pride myself in examining the things everyone esle takes for granted. Generally, I find most things people do or like are vestiges of times past, and they really can't explain it. We're seeing it in this thread.
I'm not the least bit lonely; I have a wonderful girlfriend are great friends and neighbors. What's in it for me to involve the state in my relationship? Does doing that in ANY way guarantee I'll not wind up alone? Nope- my relationship is probably MORE likely to fail if I'm married because of the reverse incentives on women, and I'll lose half my stuff to boot.
The contract is a vestige from the days of agriculture when a single woman was SOL, like you said. Those days are over, and you have to pay a woman child support whether you were married or not (which I'm fine with). Now, a woman can step out on you, take your stuff, and have you support her and her new guy with alimony and there's nothing you can do about it. The terms of the contract have changed, and so has society. 70% of divorce is initiated BY the woman. What's the advantage of putting yourself in that position?
Edit: wow- Bobble posted the scenario I just laid out WHILE I was typing it out. Thanks man.